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Jay-Z & Beyoncé's Next Hit: 'Here Comes The Bride'

Illustration for article titled Jay-Z  Beyoncés Next Hit: Here Comes The Bride
  • Beyoncé and Jay-Z have taken out a marriage license! In Westchester, NY! They have up to 60 days to tie the knot. Where do you think they're registered? And what do you get the couple who has everything? [NY Post]
  • Post-rehab Eva Mendes is "taking a break and having a good time" by exercising and being with her family. Bo-ring. [People]
  • Jane Fonda has a new boyfriend, Lynden Gillis, who met her when he asked for her autograph at a book signing. They "met cute!" [Page Six]
  • Um, we saw pictures on X17 of Lisa Rinna kissing a man who was not her husband Harry Hamlin. She was clad in a bathrobe and drinking wine. The pix were taken yesterday in Malibu. More info to come!
  • Heather Mills: Vowing to break up Paul McCartney's new romance? [Mirror]
  • Drew Barrymore: Seen photographing Bunnies at the Playboy Mansion. [Page Six]
  • Blind item! "Which lead actor in a hit ensemble TV show brags that a female conquest isn't complete unless at least one of his hotel room neighbors calls security about the noise? " [Gatecrasher]
  • Jamie Lynn Spears is planning her wedding! It will take place at Serenity, the Kentwood, LA home Britney bought for the fam, and Brit will probs be a bridesmaid. Can't wait! [MSNBC]
  • Dita Von Teese starred in a "kinky lesbian movie" years ago, but clips are just now showing up online. Someone send a link please? (For a friend.) [The Sun]
  • Madonna and Guy Ritchie sleep with electronic devices: "We lie right next to each other with our BlackBerrys under our pillows. It's not unromantic, it's practical." [The Sun]
  • Madonna will be in Malawi next week for a final court ruling on whether she can adopt David Banda. There are an estimated 1 million orphans in the country, so her chances look good. [Reuters]
  • Oh, and Madonna thinks of the UK as her home. "My kids are at school there, my horses are there. And I love the weather. All that rain and moisture are good for the skin." [Mirror]
  • Sharon Osbourne says of daughter Kelly's friends: "I don't approve of them." Could she be talking about Ms. Amy Winehouse? [Mirror]
  • Tracey Edmonds, who "got married" to Eddie Murphy on a tropical island in January only to break up with him 2 weeks later, is now dating TV chef Rocco DiSpirito. Good luck! [Concrete Loop]
  • The Village Voice's Michael Musto continues to ask: Ellen Page a lesbian? [Village Voice]
  • Velvet Revolver no longer has Scott Weiland as its lead singer. "his increasingly erratic onstage behavior and personal problems have forced us to move on." But he's so so hot! [Rolling Stone]
  • Celine Dion's Beijing show is canceled because organizers didn't get the proper permits. China, what's up with you lately? [Reuters]
  • That Valkyrie movie, in which Tom Cruise plays a Nazi with an American accent, might just be sucktastic. Is Tom getting desperate for a career comeback? [LA Times]
  • Jimmy Kimmel says after he shot the video for "I'm Fucking Ben Affleck," "I brought Ben back to my house to watch Lost, and I ended up spooning with him." [Rush & Molloy]
  • Robin Williams' wife filed for divorce last week — is it because Robin is dating an artist who is 29 years younger? [Rush & Molloy]
  • If Avril Lavigne ran a celebrity tabloid, "I would make it completely positive," she says. "There's so much negativity right now. I'd pick up the big stories, but they'd have to be positive." [Rush & Molloy]
  • American Idol contestant David Cook was rushed to the hospital last night with heart palpitations and high blood pressure. He's been stressed out because his brother has cancer. He was released but is being monitored. [TMZ]
  • Also, Ryan Seacrest hurt is knee. Poor baby. [TMZ]
  • Jay Leno apologized yesterday for prompting Ryan Phillippe to give the camera his "gayest look" on-air. (Phillippe replied,"Wow. That is so something I don't want to do.") GLAAD said Leno's "joke" was "demonstrating a lack of respect." [People]
  • Tia Mowry of '90s show Sister, Sister is getting married in 3 weeks, and leaning on — you guessed it — her sister Tamera for help. [People]
  • Oooh, a London-based version of The Hills? With brainier chicks? [E!]
  • Rumer Willis will guest star on Miss Guided, the TV show produced by her stepdad, Ashton Kutcher. Now you can't say she's famous for nothing! [ET]

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Question: What do you get the couple that has everything?

Answer: A shot at this marriage lasting. I don't think they have one of those.