Jared Kushner, Chief-of-Son

Illustration for article titled Jared Kushner, Chief-of-Son
Image: Getty

It’s me, just vaping away on a Thursday.

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

  • No one wants to be Trump’s chief of staff, so he’s apparently turning to Jared Kushner. I love nepotism. : ) [Huffington Post]
  • Pecker, Cohen, and Trump, just three men in a room talking about hush money payments. [NBC News]
  • More bad news for Trump: his 2017 inaugural committee is under criminal investigation for possibly misspending some of the money it raised and over whether its donors gave money in exchange for access, which all sounds extremely believable and very illegal. [Wall Street Journal]
  • The Senate voted 56-41 to withdraw U.S. military support for Saudi Arabia’s devastating war in Yemen. More from the New York Times: “Its immediate effect was largely symbolic, after the House earlier this week moved to scuttle it, all but assuring that the measure will expire this year without making it to Mr. Trump’s desk. But the action signaled a growing sense of urgency among lawmakers in both parties to punish Saudi Arabia for its role in the brutal killing of the journalist Jamal Khashoggi, and to question a decades-old bipartisan tradition of Washington averting its gaze from human rights abuses and other wrongdoing by the kingdom in the interest of preserving a strategically important relationship in the Middle East. Senators also approved, by a voice vote, a resolution to hold Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, the heir to the kingdom’s throne, personally responsible for Mr. Khashoggi’s killing.” [New York Times]
  • Some good news—the House and the Senate also passed legislation that would ban states from holding children in adult jails, and the bill now awaits Trump’s signature. According to the Marshall Project, it would also “require states receiving federal dollars to collect data on racial disparities in the juvenile system and to come up with concrete plans for addressing those inequities. It would ban the shackling of pregnant girls, as well as provide funding for tutoring, mental health, and drug and alcohol programs for kids.” [Marshall Project]
  • The Department of Homeland Security would like us to know that it is “committed to building wall and building wall quickly,” okay??? [Department of Homeland Security]
  • The annual White House Christmas party for members of the media, which anyone with an ounce of self-respect would have planned on skipping, has been canceled. [Independent]
  • Alleged Russian spy Maria Butina has pleaded guilty to a charge of conspiring to act as a foreign agent, admitting that she was part of a Russian effort to gain entry into Republican political circles. [CNN]
  • Noted racist and Florida’s governor-elect Ron DeSantis is doing his best to delay the restoration of voting rights to people convicted of felonies. Wonder why! [Tampa Bay Times]
  • Gun deaths in the U.S. have reached their highest levels in decades, according to the CDC. Last year, nearly 40,000 people died by guns. [CNN]
  • Wow, for once, I agree with you! [Twitter]

Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:


This has been Barf Bag.

Senior reporter, Jezebel


JujyMonkey: unstable genius

Pecker, Cohen, and Trump, just three men in a room talking about hush money payments.”

if there was any justice in the world, theNational Enquirer headline would read:

“Pecker Payout Problems Plague President!”