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Japan's Desperate Plea to Make Citizens Reproduce

Illustration for article titled Japans Desperate Plea to Make Citizens Reproduce

Japan's birthrate is declining, and soon there won't be enough young people to keep its social security system afloat. Solution: get people to hook up and make babies. To that end, some Japanese local governments are offering classes on attracting the opposite sex.


According to ABC, the prefecture of Gifu is just one Japanese region to step in and teach its youth how to like each other. Classes include "makeup and styling lessons for women, dating role play and voice projection exercises for men." The organizer claims that "a lot of men don't know how to make themselves appealing to women. They only know to talk about their jobs and hobbies, but that conversation doesn't extend beyond the first meeting. We prep them beforehand to make sure it does." Clearly Patti Stanger needs to travel to Japan — she'd be the perfect person to berate its population into procreating.

Romance and Sex Need Government Nudge in Japan [ABC]

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Ari Schwartz: Dark Lord of the Snark

The elderly are a big portion of Japan's problem. However, the big problem overall is the nasty little number known as "debt-to-GDP." Japan has nearly 200% debt-to-GDP, with much of that tied up in obligations such as social security and services.

However, much of that is bonds that were floated amidst the grand Keynesian experiment of the 90s and 2000s (a piss poor one at that), in the hopes of stimulating the economy. In the end, all Japan ended up with are concrete bullshit everywhere (ever been there and wondered why the hills are covered in concrete? Stimulus packages!) and tons of bridges to nowhere.

The only way to grow out of a debt that large? Grow the economy. The only way to do that? Either increase efficiency per worker or increase the population. In Japan's case, robots aren't magically happening, and nobody is making babies.

You know all the freaking out that people are doing over what happens if this or that little 2nd tier European country defaults? Hah. Wait until Japan defaults. It's gonna be a shitshow.