A short two years after Jamie Foxx and Katie Holmes were first seen holding hands in Malibu for all the world (paparazzi) to see, and a short few months after they were seen together-together at the Met Gala, Page Six reports their six-year, mostly-secret relationship has finally fallen apart.
On Friday, pictures surfaced of Foxx, 51, holding hands with Sela Vave, a singer who some reports say only graduated from high school last year. My take on this photo is that Foxx’s hand-holding is more protective than romantic, but that hasn’t stopped the gossip rags from declaring that Foxx cheated on Holmes, that he and Vave are in a relationship, that they’re going to get married and eventually die and be placed in side-by-side burial plots, still wearing the outfits they wore to Lil Pump’s 19th birthday at Bootsy Bellows (a white Balenciaga sweatshirt and nude mini dress, respectively).
What does Holmes think of all this? Not much:
But a spy at La Esquina overheard the actress — who was having dinner with girlfriends at the Kenmore Street restaurant — tell a pal, “What Jamie does is his business — we haven’t been together for months.”
For a couple who managed the near-impossible feat of keeping their relationship a “secret,” that seems like a pretty complete quote to randomly drop in a public place, but whatever. The point is, it’s clear that the relationship lost its fire once it was out in the open; that it faltered under the pressure of our prying eyes; that if we’d just let Holmes and Foxx keep sneaking in and out of parties separately like they did before, this wouldn’t have happened. RIP FoxxHolmes. We hardly know ye. [Page Six]
The joke is that the toddlers can eat whatever they want because they’re on vacation, GET IT?