As reported on J. Lo's Instagram, Jennifer Lopez and Leah Remini were rear-ended by a drunk driver this weekend; thankfully, no one was harmed.
Quoth Jennifer Lopez in a caption attached to a slightly peeved-lookin' selfie, "Sitting at a light, Riding high right before some drunk fool rear ended us in my new whip!!! Thank god everyone ok!!! #GRATEFUL #THANKYOUGOD #DontdrinkandDrive!!!! #cursedthatfoolout #theBronxcameout #dontmesswithmycocnuts #mamabear #leahstayedcalm #thatwasweird."
TMZ reports that the driver sped off from the scene, but police eventually caught him. He is now facing DUI and hit-and-run charges in addition to the wrath of J. Lo, which has far more daunting repercussions than the justice of mortals. [Us Magazine]
Look at this sweet lil photo of Kim and Kanye. They love each other and fashion week, and they both appreciate her butt. [Gossip Cop]
(HEART)BREAKING NEWS ON THE CHAVRIL FRONT: Avril Lavigne celebrated her 30th birthday without Chad Kroeger. The marriage struggle is real. In other news, I am surprised to learn that Avril Lavigne was 29 years old when she made that terrifying "Hello Kitty" video in which she mostly squeaked in a tutu. [E!]
- Nicole Scheriznger, formerly of The Pussycat Dolls, has joined a London production of the musical CATS. Seems appropriate, given her prior singing/dancing cat-related experience. [ONTD]
- Rhianna might be in the next James Bond movie. I didn't see her in Battleship (because only four or five people have ever seen Battleship), but I assume she was perfect in it, making this also an appropriate choice. [ONTD]
- Tank top-clad changeling Justin Bieber whisked poor Selena Gomez to St. Martin by flapping his patterned drop crotch pants, where he proceeded to take some Instagram photos. Young love. [ONTD]
- Look at all these outfits Amal Alamuddin wore over the course of her matrimonial weekend. Commit to the slideshow and you will behold an excellent hat. That is all. [Hello!]
- Gwyneth Paltrow celebrated her birthday; from the looks of her Instagram, she did so by making her friends hold roses around her face (presumably by hissing "IT'S MY BIRTHDAY AND I WANTS IT" until they complied with her request). Chris Martin was there. What a time to be alive. [Gossip Cop]
- Tom Selleck was interviewed for the GQ age issue (THANK GODDESS). He says he has never given his mustache a nickname. How is that possible? [People]
- Katy Perry and Diplo: still possibly engaging in that extended sexual game we like to call "love." [People]
- Beyoncé and Jay Z are in the process of shopping for a mega-mansion in L.A. RIP forever, divorce rumors. We had a good summer. [Billboard]
Images via Instagram.