Just in time for Valentine's Day, a tipster passed along this charming novelty item. It gets a man what he really wants: For his woman to shut up and get naked. Don't worry, there's a male version. For equality!

The buttons on the Control A Woman Remote include:

# GIVE ME - beer, sex, food
STOP - nagging, moaning, whining
# Say yes
# Say no
# Remove clothes
# Cook
# Clean
# Leave
# Calm down
# Hurry up

Withholding, whiny, and hysterical: sounds about right.

So we girls can get ours, the Control A Man's version's central button is, of course, "Propose." Others include "Flowers" and "Massage." The conversation topics range from "shoes," "feelings," and "shopping." Guys, you totally read my mind.

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Control A Woman Remote [NeedAPresent]
Control A Man Remote [NeedAPresent]