Is Clinton In, Out, Up, Down, Wrong Or Right?

Illustration for article titled Is Clinton In, Out, Up, Down, Wrong Or Right?

It's a week that belongs to the chattering class and, apparently, Katy Perry and whatever music and puppy cams can get The Daily Beast's Ana Marie Cox through another day of speculation about Hillary Clinton's potential nomination for (and/or acceptance of) Secretary of State. That, plus what David Frum's writing reminds us of, and what we would really like to see happen in the first 100 days of the Obama Administration, after the jump.MEGAN: It's morning again, and I'm finally awake enough to realize that I put my shirt on backwards when I went to bed last night... and I wasn't even intoxicated. ANA MARIE: You put a shirt on to go to bed? lerjkewjr! Sorry that was my kind of clearing my throat. Typing- wise. MEGAN: Otherwise my boobs get all wonky. Plus, I prefer my place kind of chilly and I haven't swapped in my winter bedclothes. ANA MARIE: Ah, a nightshirt. I was somehow thinking you wore, like, a tux. MEGAN: That would be kind of awesome, but I feel like the shirt studs would leave marks. ANA MARIE: Should we talk about the news? MEGAN: Anyway, so Tina Brown was just on Morning Joe looking kind of fabulous and speaking all British-y. ANA MARIE: Yes, she sounds smart pretty much all the time. (Hi, Boss!) MEGAN: Did you watch Arianna guest on Maddow last night? ANA MARIE: I did. From the studio! Because I was on fake Countdown with fake Keith. I think maybe she and Cindy McCain have the same vocal coach. MEGAN: A bit somnolent, right? The accent makes me want to get, like, cocoa. By a fire. ANA MARIE: With that accent, I don't need cocoa. Mika just said "team of rivals" on Morning Joe. DRINK! MEGAN: Damn it, the tequila is just out of reach! Tina Brown, though, sort of makes me want to learn to like whiskey, and I mean that as a compliment. ANA MARIE: Hey, I have a question: WHY is Hillary considered a legitimate SecState nominee? Does she have some foreign policy experience I don't know about? I asked this of an MSNBC employee yesterday and she said, "Well, her husband..." and I was like, "If someone tried to give me a job because of my HUSBAND's resume, I would be embarrassed." I guess I might even make up some kind of story about Bosnian sniper fire! I mean, there's an argument that the President's job is big enough that foreign policy experience is just a PART of what you'd need to have. (Clearly, this was the American people's judgment.) But SecState? There's no other part of the job! Having worked on health care policy is kind of not relevant! MEGAN: Well, but, frankly, what foreign policy (as opposed to defense) experience did Colin Powell have? Hell, what foreign policy experience do most of our ambassadors have? Clinton's nomination is, I think, a great deal about her international star power/prestige, etc. I think it's also about her supposed managerial ability, which, having tried to work with her Senate office and watched her campaign, I frankly question. ANA MARIE: Then why not nominate Miley Cyrus? She is very popular and has not lied about being under sniper fire. MEGAN: But it's no longer a nomination, didn't you hear? Only the story is probably completely false since no one else has been able to confirm it. Like, for real, people, The Guardian is the best source on this? I go back to: Hagel, Kerry, Grabbyhands, Nunn. And then you get Hillary Clinton. ANA MARIE: Maybe this whole thing is a sideshow to make Kerry seem like a noble choice. Oh, and another thing? There are cabinet positions that Hillary would be qualified for: HHS, maybe even Defense (given her well-regarded service on the Armed Services Committee). But this whoopdedoo has probably scotched those. It's probably ruined her chances at State. To the extent it was ever real. I mean, seriously: Is this what the Obama administration is going to be like? Endless high octane pundit debates about things that won't happen? MEGAN: I think the problem is that there isn't real news to talk about! It's the gossip season. Plus, at the point at which Chris Hitchens is drunkenly inveighing against you on TV, I'm sort of more pro-the idea, frankly. Plus, it would be nearly full employment for me. Click to view ANA MARIE: Oh, and I love Christopher. I would be honored to be the subject of his inebriated inveighings. He should auction that shit off. MEGAN: MEGAN: But does he need the money? Also, can we just mention, the music that is playing on Morning Joe: "North American Scum."

ANA MARIE: They have pretty good taste in music. There's a very disappointing relationship between taste in bumper music and shows themselves. Proof: You know who has GREAT bumper music? Laura Ingraham. I see that the New York Times is selling copies of its Nov 5 edition for $15. The print media industry is saved! We will borrow the Franklin Mint business model and print WEEKS-OLD NEWS! MEGAN: And you know that the New York Times will totally make bank on that. I do not understand the people that collect that sort of stuff, but, then, I have moved around a lot in my life. ANA MARIE: You have a life, maybe? MEGAN: No, that's not true at all. I'm just too lazy to haul shit. ANA MARIE: We're going to be LIVING THROUGH the Obama administration. That sort of is my idea of keepsake. That, and the policies he'll enact. Who told the entire MSNBC hosting staff they could go on vacation this week? MEGAN: What in particular are you keen to see him do? After listening to Mika inveigh against the auto bailout, I now know what she really, really doesn't want. ANA MARIE: My wishlist for his honeymoon period? Election reform — while it's fresh on everyone's minds — to include making election day a national holiday and some kind of reform to registration so that fake registrations don't slow down legit new voters. Statehood for DC (with the Utah congressional addition off set). Exec orders on torture and Gitmo. Card check. MEGAN: Oh, see, I sort of hate card check. But I'm on board with the rest of it. ANA MARIE: AND GET THE PUPPY ALREADY! Why? Oh, and gays in the military! More gays! He could executive order that shit. MEGAN: Yes, an end to don't ask, don't tell! That would be awesome. On card check, I don't like the elimination of secret balloting. I don't know how that helps. But, then, my parents are required to belong to unions that have variously screwed over our family over the years, so I'm not exactly like "Woo, unions." ANA MARIE: You've been listening to right wing radio or something. The American workplace is not a pure and formal democracy, and employers have never had much respect for the secret ballot when it came to unions in the past. Not that unions are all good either. MEGAN: Yeah, well, how does card check help is my point? It fixes the management sins of 40 years ago? But, yeah, I remember when my dads union decided to flex their muscles for no sake other than flexing their muscles against management and my family went without health insurance for a while. Their families didn't, of course, since they were not covered by the same health insurance as us since they weren't actual employees of the organization. And we never got it back retroactive, either. But, hey, they showed management! Something. Yeah, I hold grudges. ANA MARIE: Speaking of pointless flexing of muscles: I think Lieberman will not get much more than a wrist slap. MEGAN: Ooh, I'm sure he's so scared at the loss of his subcommittee chairmanship. I can't believe that Jon Tester is defending him on MSNBC right now. How is fucking Tester scared of Jowls McGee? ANA MARIE: Nice moment though: Jon Tester just started to say "Joe was wro— DIFFERENT on the war." I think we can say "wrong" now. MEGAN: I think we could have said "wrong" then, That's on my list of stuff I'm looking forward to seeing change in an Obama Administration. I also want a full-on, prisoner-less, compromise-minimized 1984-style tax reform. ANA MARIE: I don't think Tester or anyone is scared of Jowly Joe. I think this is an attempt to extend the "no drama" policy to the Hill. An attempt that will ultimately be unsuccessful but I admire the effort. MEGAN: The point of the legislative branch is fucking "drama," so I just wonder when they forgot it. ANA MARIE: And, yes, I think there will be drama to spare. No thanks to sleepwalkers like Mark Warner, but I have faith in, you know, McCain. MEGAN: Well, and let's not forget Max Baucus is running around with his own health care reform bill when Kennedy is promising his next year. ANA MARIE: There you go. DRAMA! COMPETING HEALTH CARE BILL! I think we have the solution to reviving Heroes! MEGAN: Well, and this is why everyone is focusing on speculating about the Cabinet and Hillary Clinton: everything else is just Nerd Drama. Like, woo David Frum is leaving the National Review? ANA MARIE: So does that mean we can we talk about the new Star Trek movie? MEGAN: I am so worried it will suck. For my dad's sake, of course. ANA MARIE: Oh, and Frum is leaving to start some new "solo web project," by which he means, of course: porn. MEGAN: But PORN WITH OTHER PEOPLE!! PORN WITH OTHER PEOPLE!! Please don't make me cry. ANA MARIE: Hey, he's the one talking "solo." MEGAN: And now my brain needs another bleaching, as, inevitably, I imagine David Frum jerking off on a web cam. This is why I wasn't reading his NRO columns, to avoid that mental picture! ANA MARIE: I am clearly not the person you should be talking to first thing in the morning. I'm sorry. Tomorrow's mental images will be based on the Shiba puppy cam. Click to view MEGAN: Yay puppies! Honestly, my preference in the morning is to grumpily drink my coffee while mentally cursing the supposed need to arise before 10:00 regardless. So, it's not you, it's me.

ANA MARIE: Well as long as I have someone to watch Morning Joe with I'm good.

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Also, I cracked up at the Miley Cyrus reference. The idea of her being Sec. of State is actually entertaining.