Tell Us About Your First Life-Altering, All-Consuming Obsessive Crush

Illustration for article titled Tell Us About Your First Life-Altering, All-Consuming Obsessive Crush

So you already told us about the first time you had sex, but who was it with? Or, more appropriately, who do you wish it had been with? Or who did you wish it had been with before you knew that, actually, your crush, the supposed love of your life, was actually kind-of a jackass?


For me, it was a boy on my middle school kickball team. He was left field, I was short stop. It was never meant to be, but that didn't stop me from obsessing over what it would be like to be invited back to dinner at his house and hold hands under the table (AKA third base). The crush ended when he kicked a ball straight into my face during practice and sent me to the ER. I got five stitches. He didn't even say sorry.


As I got older, it was all Broadway stars. Anthony Rapp, anyone? (Oh, Laura.)

Tell us your most heartbreaking, most hilarious, most lovely, and/or most humiliating crush stories below. We'll compile the 10 most satisfying ones and post them early next week.

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This will probably be identified by anyone who knew me in high school, but I will change names to protect the innocent.

His name was Kevin. Oh, beautiful Kevin. He was a junior to my lowly freshman. It was truly love at first sight. He was the lead in the school musical, with a fantastic voice and stage presence - I attended to go support my sister (in the chorus), but once Kevin came onstage, if you had asked me where my sister was, I would have answered "WHAT SISTER?" I had no family! Kevin was my family now! I loved him so much I couldn't think. I would silently gasp when I saw him in the hallways, strolling with his equally beautiful friends.

I was introduced to him once, during a fire drill, by my neighbor friend who knew him through musicals. "Hey," he said. Oh god. Who knew that word could be so beautiful? I didn't. Not until Kevin said it.

The next year, fate struck. I was seated in a classroom, and happened to glance under my chair and notice a baggie of something or other. I picked it up - it was Kevin's motherfucking senior portraits! He had left it in there from the class before! I was in possession of like 20 copies of Kevin's senior portrait! I quickly consulted my friends.

"Give it to him in the cafeteria!! He'll be sooo grateful, and he'll have to talk to you! Maybe he'll invite you to sit!" While the thrill of another interaction was intoxicating, it was almost scarier than never seeing him again. What if I said something stupid? What if I did something stupid??? I couldn't. I just couldn't. I was too insecure and awkward, and Kevin was too beautiful!

I turned it into the office and told them I had found it under my seat. I'll never know if they got it back to Kevin, but I know if they did and he took a quick count, he'd find he was one picture short. You BET I stole one.

Kevin graduated and left. Devestation was complete. A few years later, applying to college, being accepted to my first choice, I realized Kevin and I would be at the same school again!!! (It really wasn't on purpose. I'm not that much of a stalker.) For another two years, we would be united in the same place! Hallelujah, fate has struck again!

And I saw him again. I got to college, looked for him, and saw him. Just as I had hoped I would. And I don't know what happened in those few years - I don't know if it was extremely obvious the whole time, if he started dressing differently, coiffing his hair differently, or if I just grew up, but the moment I laid eyes on him in college, I knew:

Kevin is suuuuuuuuuuuuperrrrrrr gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyy.