In Defense of Depression

Illustration for article titled In Defense of Depression

I have never been an exceedingly happy person. For those people who (offline) found me chipper or perky, well, I'm sorry, but I was probably faking it. On the other hand, I've studied two instruments, 3 languages, 5 or 6 different types of dance and I left a promising mainstream job to write for a living. The times in my life in which I was least creative or thoughtful were the times in which I was objectively the most content. It turns out, though, that according to experts quoted in the new Newsweek, I might be sort of normal like that. I can't say it makes me happy, but it probably makes me feel marginally less unique (which maybe makes me less happy). It's a cycle, after all.

There is a growing backlash against the pop-a-pill-get-happy version of recovery, in which those of us marginally depressed are encouraged to be more "normal" in part, according to teacher Jess Decourcy Hinds, "because observing another's anguish isn't easy." NYU Professor Jerome Wakefield (who co-authored The Loss of Sadness: How Psychiatry Transformed Normal Sorrow Into Depressive Disorder) has students coming up to him all the time asking how to get their parents to lay off the Prozac-pushing because they want to feel their emotions sometimes. And, as previously mentioned, psychiatrist Charles Barber, author of Comfortably Numb notes that emotions — even those brought on by the loss of a relationship, a friend, a job, or a family member — are normal and meant to be felt rather than medicated away.


While significant depression is bad (and requires medication and/or therapy) and it's uncomfortable to watch someone suffer emotionally, some sadness or mild depression is often actually required for some people to learn anything and grow as a person, and it's often necessary for some of us to feel inspired. Author Eric Wilson, whose book Against Happiness came out late last month, argues that "the happy man is a hollow man," but we're pretty sure he meant to say "human."

University of Illinois psychologist Ed Diener finds that there's a high-correlation between self-reported levels of "happiness" and stable, long-term relationships. His reasoning is that "if you have positive illusions about your partner, which goes along with the highest levels of happiness, you're more likely to commit to an intimate relationship." On the other hand, if you're just sort of vaguely unhappy without being actually paralyzed with ennui, you tend to make more money, achieve greater career success, get more educated and pay more attention to politics because you're trying to not be unhappy.

Being stressed and unhappy has a biological purpose, according to Diener and evolutionary biologists, who note that fear tend to force animals into action and "sadness" in mammals tends to result needed empathetic actions in others. Either way, would you rather live in a world in which the music is all Sweet Caroline and the photographs of Anne Geddes or is it a substantially better place with Nina Simone and Vincent Van Gogh even if you have to watch some of the rest of us less-creative types be unhappy?

Happiness: Enough Already [Newsweek]
Earlier: What's The Difference Between A "Real" Depressive And A Lazy Pill Freak?

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Uhh Yup!

Hey Fellow Gal-Jezzes.. at the (very slight) risk of pissing you off, allow me to speak from my annals of age & maybe wisdom. I'd remind you that to me, most of you are very dewy-fresh very Young women, and the whole subject of femininity & depression seems to take a fair amount of time to assimilate, yanno?

Growing up IS depressing! Specially if you're female and at least 1/2 tuned in!

(It's really not all that suprising, it's just that nobody preps you for it & you're stuck trying to learn from places like fashion mags, and TV, and whatever role models you can find in your world.)

Therapy is great! IF you stumble across a wise & compassionate (read Tuned In) therapist. If you're very savvy or very lucky, you'll find that that therapist is a friend, or mentor, or perhaps even a seriously altruistic & underpaid volunteer. (I've rarely rarely EVER known of a 'Park Avenue Pricey' Shrink-type who did any more for you, for a LOT more money, then someone who cares enough to listen even if they aren't getting paid.)

That's what Friends.. or Sisters, are for!

Medication can be Good! Yet ultimately, the 'scripts you or your insurance co. pay for, from Valium to whatever's popular this year as a psychotropic mood-elevating drug, don't REALLY really make you any Better, or Healthier...

Then the same ole joint, beer, margarita, occasional line of Bolivian Marching Powder, or hit of that wonder-drug Placebo that you've experienced, enjoyed, and even counted on, elsewhere /elsewhen. Or that loud loud music, or a great movie, or a killer orgasm (with or w/o squirt) or just that 5 minutes of sitting in the sunshine, listening to birds or ocean noises.

What I'm trying to say is that it's all... Yin & Yang stuff. Depression, is only the PT price you volunteer for, in order to know what the true Sublime is.

I LOVE bending & stretching my own conciousness. I respect the strength it takes to do that.. without going Left-Fielded Brittany Spearsish.

I worry a little... about the ease & social acceptence developing over the last 20 years to just let those Docs drop a Happy Pill on you/us..

And I speak with the Voice of Experience. E me anytime, and I'll tell you about 25 yrs of toeing that line, and a hell of a lot of research & growth to realize I don't have to anymore hehe.

(DISCLAIMER: I don't mean to make light of anyone else's genuine need or benefit from their own treatments THAT WORK FOR THEM re depression or related syndromes! I am only offering to share.. a bit of insight that I've gained after nearly 35 yrs of dealing with it>)