"If You Need A Brassiere, Wear One."

Illustration for article titled If You Need A Brassiere, Wear One.

Just one of the helpful "tips for single ladies" accompanying what appears to be the world's worst date, between an insolent slattern and a priggish asshole. Now put your hands up! [SadandUseless]

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BrutallyHonestBabes

Jezebel's Tips for Single Ladies:

#1: Never abort at the dinner table. Save it for dessert.

#2: Never date Tiger Woods.

#3: Bonerkilling should be done to your date's friends only, or, after the date when the boner is no longer required. Exception: the presence of a "Palin 2012!" bumper sticker on his car.

#4: Vet your date for "Team Cake" or "Team Pie" status before you go out.

#5: Never mention marriage to your date. You're a slaggy harridan who will never marry anyhow.