Hooters' Embarrassing Plan to Appeal to the Ladies Is Sort of Working

It’s been almost exactly six months since Hooters announced their stupid plan to make the “breastaurant” chain more woman friendly by changing the decor and adding fresher ingredients to the menu and guess what? The plan is working! WE’RE THE STUPID ONES, HAHAHA. BRING ME TO HOOTERS! I HEAR THEY HAVE OUTDOOR PATIOS AND GARDEN SALADS.

According to a recent consumer report, women now hate Hooters slightly less than they used to though they still really fucking hate it. The report asked customers to rate the restaurant on a scale of 100 to -100 and this year, women on average ranked Hooters at a -21, which, while still dismal, is actually a jump up from the last survey where the restaurant scored a -26. The men’s ranking also improved, going from a -3 to 2.

Perhaps, spurred by their growing success with the ladies, Hooters will continue on the path toward becoming even more woman friendly. May I suggest removing the bar and replacing it with a red tent? Because I’d really like a place where I can bleed and eat wings.