Hey, Quick Question: Would You Hit It?

“It” being this Brazilian serial killer. Well, would you?

Before you answer, let’s line up some details. He’s 26, his name is Tiago Henrique Gomes da Rocha, and here’s what the Love Calculator has to say about that:

94 percent! Dang, that’s a pro. One potential con would be that Gomes da Rocha recently went on Brazilian television to say that he was motivated by “great anger” and that his brutal motorbike killings of at least 39 people (“mostly young women, homeless people and transvestites,” reports the Mirror) were the only way to “get it out of his system.”

Here are the other pros I can identify: the penetrative heat of Gomes da Rocha’s gaze, the fact that he can speed-read backwards. Further cons include literally everything else. I’m probbbbbably a no, but there’ll be a fan club up for this guy soon regardless.