I hope you all have your pumpkin carving skills ready this Halloween, because this pumpkin demands that we all step it up this year.
The Great Feminist Pumpkin (as it henceforth shall be known) was first spotted in Williamsburg over the weekend by Rachel Smith, who declared it full of all sorts of Halloween win.
Let it be known on this day, Beyoncé did come forth in the form of a simple Brooklyn Halloween reveler and did bestow a great decree throughout the land that this holiday now is purged of all the sexist bullshit trick-or-treaters have had to endure for generations. Begone with your dumb Sexy Chinese Takeout costumes and bullshit pumpkin spice facials.
I will now spend each and every future Halloween lurking in the pumpkin patch, awaiting the triumphant return of the Great Feminist Pumpkin.
UPDATE: The Great Feminist Pumpkin bestowed its magic on us all early this year by helping the Internet find the woman who put Beyoncé on a pumpkin. Her name Yuliya Tsukerman and she is a scrimshaw artist.
Image via Rachel Smith/Twitter.