After much wailing and gnashing of teeth, Sony has decided to allow the release of The Interview (in a few theaters, anyway). Good for them. But now that it's an option, do you really want to shell out ten or more real American dollars to see a movie about a couple of goofballs assassinating a living head of state?
If you feel you must support The Interview, for freedom's sake, but have zero interest in actually watching the damn thing, turn it on your laptop (it's coming to YouTube and other streaming services, says the Verge) and leave the movie streaming in another room while you view something else. Here, courtesy of the Jezebel staff, are some suggestions for counter-programming available via Netflix and elsewhere.
For instance, I would rather watch (for the second time) that one documentary about a dude trying to build a tiny house, which is secretly a dark comedy about a dude who doesn't know anything about construction trying to build a tiny house. Or any one of a number of TV Christmas movies, such as ABC Family's 12 Days of Christmas. (Currently one of my top recommendations, for my movie-watching sins.) You could do a whole lot worse than the genuinely lovely Ballet Russes. Or, not to be a total bummer, Kimjongilia. Other suggestions:
Emma: Troop Beverley Hills which somehow she'd never seen until recently? Also: "the one where Robin Wright and Naomi Watts have boy toys and the boy toys are each other's sons" (Adore) and "the saddest parts of Blackfish on loop."
Kara: Every episode of Gilmore Girls. Documentaries about veganism. Every episode of Frasier. She also wants to know: "Is CNN's coverage of ferguson on Netflix?"
Hillary: Almost Famous, every season of Peaky Blinders, Happy Valley, The Bletchley Circle, The Fall and join her independent investigation into whether Jamie Dornan is indeed sexier than Charlie Hunnam, finally settling that stupid 50 Shades of Grey debate. Her verdict thus far? No. Alternatively, "all of the bad black movies The Husband wants me to watch."
Colin: "Literally anything." More specifically: "Any movie where the dog dies. Even that would be better than The Interview."
Clover: Every one of the "romantic movies" suggestions. The House Hunters collection. Honey Badgers: Masters of Mayhem.
Julianne: The Dark Matter of Love, a documentary about adoption that she watched for 30 seconds last night before turning it off. Forensic Files. Undercover Boss. The Woman Who Wasn't There (actual rec, to be clear) about a woman who posed as a 9/11 survivor.
Alternatively, we'd like to issue a collective recommendation of Sons of Anarchy, but fast-forwarding to the scenes featuring Charlie Hunnam's truly glorious butt. We welcome your suggestions.
Photo via Getty.