Helpful Handbooks: What If Kids Had A Guide To Parents?

Noting the seemingly endless supply of guides to children for first-time parents that are currently on the market, Jon Methven of The Good Men Project argues that perhaps kids should be given a guide to parents as well:

Discussing his own experience as an expectant first-time parent, Methven explains that while researching various parenting guides, he realized there were no handbooks for the people on the other side of things: the children dealing with the wacky ways of the adults in their lives.

“Like everyone, I made mistakes growing up that provoked heated reactions from my parents. Now that I’m older, wiser, and paying my own car insurance, I understand why they reacted to these mistakes the way they did,” Methven writes, “But back then, a parent manual would have been useful, a how-to reference guide to discover what was occurring on their side of our disagreements.” His suggestions as to what the guide should cover? Everything from “Chapter 42: Mom’s Saliva: All Natural Cleaning Agent, or Unhygienic Use of Spittle in the H1N1 Era?” to “Chapter 197: Broccoli: How Daddy’s Post-Collegiate Dietary Choices Mean You’ll Sit There Until You’re Finished.”

The whole piece is very funny and cute (and yes, written with the understanding that babies can’t read) and there’s also a bit of truth to it, as I think many of us would have loved some insight into the somewhat puzzling ways of our parents back in the day, or at least some tips on how to spin certain scenarios to our advantage. I’d probably add “Chapter 78: Rewards Systems: How Sitting Still In Church Increases Your Chances Of A Post-Church Doughnut Breakfast By 85%” or some such. Any chapters you wish you had as a kid? (Or now, even?) Feel free to add them in the comments.