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Gwyneth's Cookbook Is Beyond Parody

Illustration for article titled Gwyneths Cookbook Is Beyond Parody

We'll get to the recipes soon, we promise. For now, just marinate in the organic entitlement that is My Father's Daughter: Delicious, Easy Recipes Celebrating Family & Togetherness.


Yes, names are dropped. Yes, unexamined privilege is rampant. Yes, she makes a "po'boy." Yes, some of the recipes look very tasty. There are some genuinely sweet ancedotes. And naturally, the pictures — and the author — are, as she would say, "gorge." At points, it feels like a clever parody of the cookbook Gwyneth Paltrow would write. Eater has done some masterful work, pulling what they term "the best lines" from Gwyneth's tome. These are a few of our favorites:

"One evening when I had my wood-burning stove going I realized I hadn't thought of dessert."


"We've got a wood-burning pizza oven in the garden-a luxury, I know, but it's one of the best investments I've ever made."

"I first had a version of this at a Japanese monastery during a silent retreat-don't ask, it's a long story."

The Best Lines From Gwyneth Paltrow's Cookbook [Eater]

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Jezebel, what the fuck is your problem?

There are people in this world who are real, honest-to-God pieces of shit and should be called out on every hateful, epicly stupid and destructive thing they do. And yet here you are, once again busy hating someone who is...what exactly? Too smug (as you like to put it)? Too happy with her life for you? Too privilaged (another oft-used word when she's the topic)? Too friendly with certain other celebs? Too happy to discuss her fabulous life? Oh wait, I just did a search and yes, that's apparently exactly what the problem is: [] So basically, at least one Jez writer has been tending her dislike for the last 15 years. Wow.

It's beneath this site, it's beneath your readers to feel like you constantly have to take her down a peg or two. The world is already full enough of the "Ugh, I hate her!" sophomore mentality. Fine, don't like her, but the coverage is tedious and toxic.

Yesterday, you weren't satisfied with her video post in support of Planned Parenthood: [] ("It's also only 10 seconds long, which is exactly how long most Americans can tolerate her.") Really? You had to be back-handed about it?

I'm not even a fan of hers. I wouldn't see or not see a movie b/c she's in it. I don't go to her web site. I'm not going to buy this cookbook. But when you post about every single benign act by someone just to mock it, I won't get behind that. Jezebel is better than that. Or, at least, it should be.