I love the GQ "Man of the Year" awards cause it's like the "Sexiest Man Alive" but, like, Tony Bennett is in the running. And indeed, there he was (heart, presumably, in San Francisco) last night at British GQ's iteration at London's Royal Opera House, along with Gordon Ramsey, Robert Plant and a bunch of other Brits. And I know it was the gents' night, but man...the distaff side was appalling. I mean, we expect a jolly train wreck from Lily Allen, but Liz Hurley? Thandie Newton? Fasten your seatbelts, it's gonna be a bumpy night. After the jump!

The Good:

Miranda Kerr was the only straight-up "Good" of the night, and by the time I got to her I was so traumatized I was just braced for some hideous scroll-down fug. Didn't happen!

Normally, Tana "Mrs. Gordon" Ramsey 's metallic mini wouldn't be much more than "inoffensive," but today I greeted her taste with cries of gratitude.
The Bad:


Say what you will about Lily Allen - and perhaps you might say she resembles a tipsy Scarlett O'Hara working with Sears drapes? - never bores.


Kirsty Gallagher's dress would be elegant. If the entire bodice weren't a transparent piece of polyester lace, that is.

Hm. Not sure Jamie Winstone can qualify as a scroll-down fug when the dress itself is a minor infraction. The shoes, however, do make the outfit.


Sigh. Remember the days when Elizabeth Hurley was a fashion icon? Granted, it was for wearing that Versace safety-pin dress, but still.


I'm feeling flat-out betrayed by the normally-impeccable Thandie Newton's tacky mini.

Sometimes it's like there's such a philosophical gap between your taste and someone else's that, as in the case of Tess Daly, you kind of have to accept it and move on to preserve your own sanity.
The Ugly:


See, it's kind of artist Tracey Emin's thing to look like she's coming off a bender at all times - and by the way, the one time I saw her in the street she looked totally normal - so I think she'd want to be in this category

Images via Getty