Look at these two beautiful humans. Look at their hands, so firmly clasped as they partake in a lovers’ stroll. Yet nothing gold can stay, my dears. After 13 of marriage, Gwen Stefani is filing for divorce from her husband, Gavin Rossdale.

According to The Daily Beast, Stefani “[cited] irreconcilable differences and [requested] joint custody of their three children. Rossdale filed for the same thing simultaneously.” I would say “this shit is bananas,” but this news is too devastating for such levity.

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Rossdale is being represented by Laura Wasser, celebrity divorce lawyer extraordinaire known for representing Kim Kardashian in her divorce from Kris Humphries. Wasser plays to win, so let’s hope the proceedings don’t take an ugly turn.

And ideally, they won’t. To the public, Stefani and Rossdale make the following statement:

“While the two of us have come to the mutual decision that we will no longer be partners in marriage, we remain partners in parenthood and are committed to jointly raising our three sons in a happy and healthy environment.”

TMZ’s sources say the couple does not have a prenuptial agreement. I wonder if this was a mistake, given that Rossdale’s continued endeavors in the name of relevance were probably something of a turnoff. Surely he could have contractually agreed to rest on the laurels of Sixteen Stone.

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In any case, let us all take this moment to mourn together, united by his ragged croon. Are you humming these bars to yourself tonight, Gavin? It’s ok, sweet man. We’re here.


Contact the author at rachel.vorona.cote@jezebel.com.

Image via Getty. Video via YouTube.

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