Frisky Marie Claire Writer Tries Not To Have Sex; Fails

Illustration for article titled Frisky Marie Claire Writer Tries Not To Have Sex; Fails

Writer Colleen Oakley did a stunt for the new issue of Marie Claire magazine that involved not having sex with her fiance for one month. Oakley, you see, was trying to follow the rules set down by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., as outlined in his book, Sex Detox. Kerner recommends a celibacy program to help couples break out of sexual ruts and make sure that they're connecting on an intimate level without sex. The thing is, after starting her detox, Ms. Oakley found that she and Fred, her fiance, couldn't keep their hands off each other: They lasted about four days. Then they tried again and lasted 12 days. (Yeah, he's black, don't start!) And if it wasn't enough that Ms. Oakley wrote about her sex life with Fred in detail for the magazine, the couple appeared on the Today show this morning to talk about it too.

As the clip above shows, Fred had the decency to look vaguely embarrassed and Al Roker seemed to sympathize. In her article, Ms. Oakley admits that she uses "sex as a security blanket" to confirm that she's "attractive and loved." But if a detox was supposed to help her from making everything about sex, didn't it backfire? How is talking about shagging on national TV with a weatherman solving anything? It's cool if you're a frisky kitty, just don't pretend you want to reform. Also: please note the two feet of space between Fred and Colleen on the Today Show couch.

I Swore Off Sex for a Month [Marie Claire]
Related: To Have Better Sex, Give It Up For A Month [NBC News]

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I agree, "For the fuck of shit" is being added to my lexicon.

On another note, this is kind of a no brainer. If you don't have sex, you'll usually want it if you're in a healthy relationship.

I say, have sex SO much that you get bored of it and start looking for other stuff to do. There's your intimacy, byotch. Or integrate sex into non-sexual things.

Sex Chess: Make a list of sexual positions or acts that correspond to the individual pieces, then, when you take a player's piece, you spend five minutes trying the position associated with the taker. I don't know what the "queen" is, but I see it getting a lot of action.

Sex Dishes: One person washes the dishes and the other person tries to get them to drop the dish in question through sexual acts.

Sexual Judge Judy: Start going at it. Every time she chastises someone, the parties in question say something out of line, or the bailiff nods in agreement with Judy, switch positions. Yeah, it's supposed to look like a circus act.

Sex Vacuuming: One person lays on the floor and the other takes a vacuum and...

Nevermind. You get my point.