Eva Longoria Held Victoria Beckham's Baby, Which Means She's Desperate For One Of Her Own

By Luke Malone  |  November 4, 2011 | 1:00pm
CelebritiesDirt Bag

Though Victoria Beckham‘s eyes seem to tell Eva Longoria to get her child-hungry mitts off her four-month-old daughter Harper, shockingly, that’s probably not the case. However, seeing how women of a certain stature can’t scoff down a burrito lunch without accusations of secret pregnancies we’re going to play along for Friday fun. “Eva was convinced she’d fall pregnant last summer and even told Desperate Housewives creator Marc Cherry that she was trying,” says a source from two years ago about her attempts with the husband who cheated on her. Poor desperate Eva! But, seriously you guys, you know how crazy and hormonal women get — Victoria had better put a microchip in that thing. [Daily Mail]

Stephanie Meyer has driven a stake into the hearts (I know, forgive me) of obsessive Twilight fans everywhere by saying that Bella and Edward are over. “There was a time when I thought I would never stop writing about vampires,” she says of her Barbara Cartland dreams. “Right now, I really don’t have much drive towards vampires … Sometimes you just want to get into a new world.” [E!]
Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson and that other guy [shields face] make a real-life grab for immortality at their Walk of Fame ceremony. [E!]
Twilight: Breaking Hymen director Bill Condon now says it was Kirsten who was doing all of the thrusting on set. [People]

Mourning the temporary loss of her bizarre popularity, Kim Kardashian wears all black as she leaves Australia. [Radar]
Kim and Kris Humphries are still talking and texting “on their Blackberrys” says a source. A source who is most likely mom Kris with a handkerchief over the receiver, who then promptly called the smartphone company and asked for her $10K whisper marketing fee. [Radar]
And fake-estranged husband Kris made more out of the scam than you’d think. [The Superficial]
Married for just over two of them, Kim tells family members she “spent the last few months struggling” with her marriage. [TMZ]
Mom Kris smiles with her devil eyes when she says her daughter shouldn’t have to give back the $2 million ring. “It’s a gift – you keep a gift,” she said, while rattling her tail. [Daily Mail]
Vera Wang is the latest one to be let down by the divorce saga, because she fears her new line of dresses inspired by the sham wedding might be “cursed”. Which, admittedly, is a bit much. [Page Six]
Maybe Kim going underground is a ploy to make way for the next in the endless Kardashian procession, with little sister Kendall coming of age. [E!]

Tegan and Sara are set to release a live DVD/CD release of their Sainthood tour as they prepare to record their seventh studio album – they’re like the Parker Poseys of music in terms of output. This trailer for the 30-minute documentary they filmed is pretty neat. [Billboard]

Transgender actress Jamie Clayton says that between scoring a two-episode arc on Hung and Chaz Bono‘s recent Dancing With The Stars stint things are looking up for trans visibility. “I think we’re moving in a really positive direction and getting exposure,” she says. “With him being on Dancing With the Stars and then with me on Hung, I think that it’s all really good the more people see us … Hopefully, people will just become sort of numb to the fact that we have this past.” Amen sister! [E!]

  • Ashton Kutcher makes promises he can’t keep by telling Demi he’ll cut down on Twittering, attend more culty Kabbalah and stop the flirting. Apparently, extramarital fucking didn’t make the list. [The Sun]
  • Having spent a few long weekends in the UK, it makes sense that Kate Hudson is speaking with an English accent. [Janet Charlton’s Hollywood]
  • Billy Crudup, 43, is dating Meryl Streep‘s 25-year-old daughter Grace. [ONTD]
  • Today is the day that jury deliberations are expected in the Michael Jackson trial, with 12 people deciding the fate of Conrad Murray. [CNN]
  • It’s a bit of a non-story but every time I get to mention the last name of Kate Winslet‘s new piece I giggle at the awesome ridiculousness of it all. Kate and Ned — pause for effect — Rocknroll were “openly kissed in the coat-check line” at Sleep No More in New York. Openly kissing? Outrageous! [Page Six]
  • Gossip Girl‘s Michael Michele lost it when she misplaced a $250,000 diamond and emerald-encrusted bracelet at some Museum of Natural History gala. Apparently the functional clasps only come with bracelets that cost 300 gees and over. [Page Six]
  • Cute pictures of Emma Stone in Wind Of The Willows at the tender age of 11. [Daily Mail]
  • Snooki kindly tells GQ that The Situation is almost broke but she’s been saving her pennies. When they suggested she doesn’t need to she scoffed: “”I don’t care. My entire outfit is probably like 50 bucks total.” Which is pretty awesome, she’s like a little, fake tan-drenched Suze Orman. [NYDN]
  • Never really caring about that Kate Plus 8 carry-on, but perhaps overly invested in Extreme Couponing, news that Kate Gosselin is a blogger for a coupon website makes her roughly 12 per cent more interesting. She’s up 11.5 per cent! [NYDN]
  • Kate may have even gained a few more points, for all the wrong reasons, by letting her kids play under the wheels of her van. [Radar]
  • Is Grey’s Anatomy still a thing? [E!]
  • Are you all sitting down? Stars like Drew Barrymore, Eddy Murphy and Reese Witherspoon make a shitload of money. [E!]
  • Mariah Yeater had better watch her back, she messed with Justin Bieber and now his horde of freakish Beliebers are out for blood. For real, like death threats real. [E!]
  • Cue Jimmy Fallon‘s ‘(It’s Not My) Baby.’ [Billboard]
  • The Selena Gomez stalker was at the top of his game by acting all insane-like in court. [TMZ]
  • Should Kirsten Wiig play Chord Overstreet‘s Glee mom? She can play his daughter if she wants, we just want more, more, more of her! [E!]
  • What’s that buzzing? Oh, that’s just the sound of magazine editors warming up their imaginary ultrasound machines after Fergie was tricked into saying she might one day want a baby. [E!]
  • Lady Gaga and Katie Couric are spending Thanksgiving together. [People]
  • Why on earth does Simon Cowell‘s trailer have the ability to be transformed into a top-notch emergency room? What’s he doing in there? [TMZ]
  • First Adele and then R. Kelly and John Mayer, now Keith Urban is the latest singer taken down by the selective throat plague sweeping the globe. It’s best to avoid singing in the shower or toilet (no judgements!) for the time being, just until the CDC get a handle on things. [E!]
  • Darren Aronofsky goes from Black Swan to Lou Reed/Metallica music video. [Billboard]
  • The wife of Porky’s star Wyatt Knight reveals he took his own life to escape post-cancer pain. [TMZ]
  • She may have fired half of her team, but now Hilary Swank has been burned after her PR company drops her like a hot, monster-loving potato. [E!]
  • Hugh Grant‘s baby girl is named Jessica, apparently. [Mirror]
  • The Kids Are All Right is being made into a TV show, huh? A prequel you say? Cool. [Vulture]
  • Katie Holmes is kicking off the new trend for winter: sweats and ankle boots. [Daily Mail]
  • Michael Lohan may be in solitary confinement but that doesn’t mean he can’t make collect calls to his assortment of classy ex-girlfriends. [Radar]
  • An article preceded by the headline ‘Anne Hathaway‘s Luminous Skin: How To Get It’ is a lot less ominous than it sounds. [US]

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