Drunk Dudes Are Smarter Than Sober Dudes

Illustration for article titled Drunk Dudes Are Smarter Than Sober Dudes

Obviously you already knew that alcohol makes you more attractive and more interesting, but did you know it can also make you more of a genius? And just in time for LSAT Practice Test Night at Señor Frog's! SPRING BREAK! WOOOOOO!!!

A new study from the University of Illinois suggests that drinking alcohol can actually make men better at solving problems (Albert Einstein? That dude was wasted, like, all the time):

Astonishingly, those in the drinking group averaged nine correct questions to the six answers correct by the non-drinking group. It also took drunk men 11.5 seconds to answer a question, whereas non-drunk men needed 15.2 seconds to think. Both groups had comparable results on a similar exam before the alcohol consumption began.

It's important to note that their level of alcohol consumption was below the legal limit, and it worked on creative problems but not on working memory problems. According to Wiley, alcohol improves creative memory by decreasing working memory, which is the ability to remember one thing while you're thinking of something else.

Said Wiley, "Sometimes it's good to be distracted."

The study only tested men—sorry, ladies, everyone knows your cute little brains are just for decoration anyway! But, bros, if you think you're bad at thinking, don't worry! It probably just means that you're thinking too much and you should probably have a couple of margaritas.


This can only end well.

Photo credit: (C) photomak / Stockfresh.

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Dear Boyfriend,

Remember that time you were drunk and said "I love you."? That was the smart you talking. Not repeating it since is the stupid you. This study proves it.

LOVE, Angelina