Cover Your Toes In Expensive Lace!

If you’re looking for a way to “sex up” your feet, allow us to introduce you to an interesting new product: Half Pretties! They are basically lingerie for your feet, and they will… ummm… cover up your disgusting toes? Or something? Here’s how the website describes them:

“Half Pretties are half-foot lace stockings made from the finest French lace. The lace is hand-selected to ensure each pair provides stretch with a smooth finish. The foot bed is padded for extra comfort and ease of wear.”

Okay, so they’re like crazy sexy comfy socks? Nope, not exactly! They only cover your toes. So they’re more like a bra for your foot? Kind of…Regardless, they’re probably comfortable, and they’re definitely versatile because you can wear them alone or you can wear them to accent shoes—where they cover your toe cleavage in a dickie-like fashion. Pretty! Well, half-pretty, anyway.

At $24.50, they’re not exactly a bargain, but if you consider that you could use them to hide your gross toenails all year long, they might allow you to forgo pedicures and therefore save you a lot of money over time. Oh, except if you buy Flirties, the open-toed shoe model, which are basically just bands of lace that wrap around the balls of your feet—and, yet, somehow cost 11 dollars more than their full-coverage cousin.