Illustration for article titled Chinese Bride Wears Record Breaking Dress • Wine Improves Sex, Study Says

• A Chinese bride may set a new record for saying "I do" while wearing the most insane gown. The groom purchased the dress, which is adorned with a record-breaking 9,999 silk flowers and a 1.2 mile train. •

• When presented with the dress, bride Lin Rong "laughed and cried at the romantic gesture." Her husband-to-be said: "I do not want a cliche wedding parade or banquet." • Following the success of a similar pilot program, DC officials have announced that they plan to offer STD testing to all high school students in the coming school year. Cue the denial driven parental outrage. • A new study found that 60% of black parents said that they would consider volunteering at their children's schools, up from 23% in 2008. Researchers believe this is part of the Obama Effect. • Little Orphan Annie turned 85 yesterday! The "Annie" comic strip first appeared on Aug. 5, 1924. Creator Harold Gray originally planed on publishing a strip called "Little Orphan Otto," but he changed it at the last minute on his editor's suggestion. • The Australian government has forged a partnership with soccer authorities in attempts to encourage more girls (and women) to play football. • In order to better understand the life of Muslim women, three British police women donned robes and hijabs for a day. The exercise, called "In Your Shoes," has drawn some criticism. "This is a complete waste of police time and taxpayers' money," said Douglas Murray of the Center for Social Cohesion. "It's not the duty of police to empathize with particular sections of the community." • The British Trade Union Congress is considering a motion to ban stiletto heels from the work place as a health hazard to women. Some women are saying, "From my cold, dead feet." • A female stripper from Australia has been found not guilty of raping the best man at a bachelor party where she was hired to perform. The victim claims that, after sticking a sex toy into his anus against his protests, Linda Naggs told him it was "just a joke," and told him not to worry, "only you and I know." • Denver Radio Station KTNI decided to scrap its indie music format in favor of "Classic Non Stop Stripper Hits, from the 80's, 90's and today." They're now going by 101.5 The Pole. • Sam, the koala made famous by this photograph, has passed away during surgery to remove several cysts caused by chlamydia. • Two important advertisers have pulled their support of radio network Austereo, following the forced confession of a 14-year-old girl that she had been raped during a lie detector segment of the Kyle and Jackie O Show. • Newspaper editor Chansa Kabwela is currently on trial for distributing images of a woman giving birth in a parking lot after she was turned away from a hospital. Zambia president Rupiah Banda deemed the images pornographic and called for charges to be brought against Kabwela. • Lula Mae Battle, 81, had charges against her dropped when prosecutors learned that her public urination arrest was due to age-related incontinence. • A woman in Texas has been charged with mutilating her infant while high on drugs. Yes, another one. • A woman from New York was ticketed for breastfeeding in a parked car. Although she admits they were in a "no standing" zone, Marta Lily and Enrique Velez pleaded with the officer not to ticket them, and offered to move while he was busy writing out the forms. • Saudi citizen Mazen Abdul-Jawad is facing more than 200 charges for appearing on a Lebanese television show discussing the fact that he's had sex and liked it. Abdul-Jawad is the divorced father of 4. • New research shows that although baby-making declines as countries achieve certain levels of wealth, it goes up again once they get really rich. • Lori Drew wants her internet access back. The Internet doesn't want her. • Daniela Earnest of Tulare, California learned that California regulations really are as bad as conservative commentators warn: local officials shut down her corner lemonade stand, which she opened to pay for tickets to Disneyland, because it lacked the proper business permits. Although the city is contemplating a change to the law, a local radio station traded her family 4 tickets to Disneyland in exchange for 30 cups of lemonade. • Be warned: The story I'm about to link to may offend some with its absurdly bad puns: According to a new study, women who down one or two glasses of wine a day have better sex lives than those who abstain. •


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