Carly Fiorina's New Ad Is A Political Ad

On Monday, Carly Fiorina’s super PAC, “Carly for America” released a new political advertisement in advance of the GOP debate on Wednesday, that proves the decades-old formula: vague platitude + swelling music = Political Dynamite.

In the spot entitled “Look At This Face,” Fiorina invites a crowd to “Look at this face,” coyly referencing that time Donald Trump questioned whether anyone could vote for someone with Fiorina’s face. A rally speech is intercut with smiling women from all walks of life who look at the camera eyes that say “I don’t know why I am being filmed.”

She then gives a speech consisting exclusively of the words, “Leadership,” “Suffrage,” “Party,” “Women,” “Communities,” “Worship,” “Majority,” “Nation.”

“This is the face of a 61-year-old woman,” Fiorina concludes. “I am proud of every year and every wrinkle.”

To be honest, I got the chills because I am a machine that has been designed to like meaningless schmaltz. Also because I wrote this from inside an ice cube, but mostly the first thing.