England is so full of frigid, uptight, misinformed men and women that London has had to open an "academy for sex and relationships". Called Amora, the museum-cum-exhibit-cum-sex school (Hee! We said "cum"!) is said to offer Britons everything from a resident sex therapist to crash-courses on lovemaking techniques, including really kinky things like, you know, spanking and shit.

A wall of sex toys — oddly including a range of silicone breast implants — is accompanied by videos of models demonstrating their use. A model of a man bent over invites you to spank him with a paddle, with lights showing whether you've gone too far, like a fairground test-your-strength machine. A plaster cast of a man and a woman invite you to feel inside for their G-spot or prostate. "That's it," they say encouragingly when you hit the right spot.


Uh, while we're all about interactivity (and we'd pay good money to see Tony Blair with his fingers up a plaster rectum!), we still believe that, like children, sex dolls are probably better seen, not heard.

Art Of Spanking At The Sex Academy [Guardian]