Breaking News: Portland Loves Anthropologie

Urban Outfitters Inc. has been lightweight struggling as of late, losing money over the past few years and returning a lackluster third quarter. But the company that owns Urban Outfitters, Free People and Anthropologie wants you to know that it’s on the upswing, because there’s a new Anthropologie in Portland, Oregon—and Portlanders LOVE IT!

According to WWD, CFO Frank Conforti spoke of this spectacular Portland Anthropologie at a Bank of America retail conference this week, orating about the “ultimate experience” it provides Portlanders desperately in need of $1600 alpaca heads and fancy twine (for their DIY art projects, no doubt!). WWD reports:

The latest opened recently in Portland, Ore. Apparel is augmented by limited-edition capsules; there are more than 300 shoe styles; upward of 800 beauty products; activewear designed for the mat, the track and the coffee shop, plus sneakers and wearable technology; intimate apparel; jewelry, including items from local artisans; a home area with a full-scale living room, dining room and bedroom displays, and a design center with specialists to offer advice. Beauty experts are also found in the Portland store.


Weirdly, it sounds a lot like an Urban Outfitters, but for Portlanders; it’s a perfect incubation zone for the “international expansion” Conforti spoke of. What is more shocking, though, is that Portlanders would even like an Anthropologie? Like, how, Portland? You did it!

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There are 2 types of girls in Portland: girls who shop at Anthropologie and girls who shop at The Bins.

Oh, and sex workers, who generally do neither.