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Bindi Irwin's Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Illustration for article titled Bindi Irwins Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Oh, Bindi Irwin! Is there anything the 9-year-old Crocodile Hunter spawn cannot do? You've seen her talk to animals; you've seen her rap. Now Bindi's attacking the fashion world! Her new children's clothing line, Bindi Wear, made its runway debut yesterday in Sydney. Bindi, left, and other kiddies modeled designs and the results were hilarious. Bindi-fanatic Slut Machine and I get catty discussing The Jungle Girl's fashions. Fierce? Ferosh? Or just frightening? Find out, after the jump.

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Illustration for article titled Bindi Irwins Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Jen: These two just can't wait to go wrangle something long and slithery together.
Tracie: Clearly the one on the right has taken a lot more care to perfect his signature walk.

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Illustration for article titled Bindi Irwins Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Jen: This "Wildlife Warrior" t-shirt is going to take on a whole other meaning when this kid hits puberty.
Tracie: I would suggest that this kid actually model in some real womenswear fashion shows, but his tits are too big.

Illustration for article titled Bindi Irwins Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Jen: Shouldn't it be "Just Say No"?
Tracie: I don't care what her shirt says. She's obviously asking for it with that short skirt.

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Illustration for article titled Bindi Irwins Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Jen: If only the real Diana Ross cared for the animals.
Tracie: Do you think that this little girl has any idea that her presence on this stage was made possible by a series of events that began with a man being stabbed in the heart by a stingray?

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Illustration for article titled Bindi Irwins Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Jen: Their faces scream, "They told us there would be candy if only we would walk out here." Obviously, they were lied to.
Tracie: Damn. Just goes to show you that no matter how you dress it down, you can't turn a bitch butch.

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Jen: If Bindi's career in fashion design doesn't work out, there's always stripping!
Tracie: I'm being completely sincere when I say that I must have that shirt.

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Illustration for article titled Bindi Irwins Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Jen: Don't you need a little more coverage than a short skirt if you're going to be wrestling crocs?
Tracie: Ew. Look at the pervs on the left trying to catch some up-skirt action.

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Illustration for article titled Bindi Irwins Wild Designs Hit The Catwalk

Jen: Wearing stripes, also pissed about the whole candy thing.
Tracie: Gangsta.

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Jen: This child's name is not Bindi.
Tracie: Is that a knuckle ring? Even more gangsta.

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Jen: Hello, playas.
Tracie: Gaysta.

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Jen: Do you really have to match your outfit to the shrubbery? Really?
Tracie: This is not America's Next Top Friend!

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Jen: Plaid capris and a snake totally clash.
Tracie: OMG, I would not let that thing near me. Terri, I mean.

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Jen: Is no one else concerned that that baby is being chased?
Tracie: She needs some weave tracks for thickness.

[Images via Getty.]

Bindi Irwin Racks Up Gear With A Message [News.com.au]

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DISCUSSION

I've got a superficial friend (she's superficial because she's really my wife's friend and well, she's superficial). Her husband's job had him spending most of our winter in South America, so she took the kids home to Australia, so that her parents could help with childcare.

Upon her return to the States, we had them over for for some Bourbon Pecan Chicken and during the course of dinner, the mother bragged that they had seen Bindi in "the airport" and that she spent some time with her daughter, who is roughly the same age.

The kid was so "whatever" about it and she really didn't have much to say, but her mom seemed thrilled. What I took from the story though, was that Bindi may not be lost yet, but her mother and my superficial friend are probably another story.