Awesome Woman Scares Groper So Badly He Craps His Pants

Illustration for article titled Awesome Woman Scares Groper So Badly He Craps His Pants

Today's heart(and pants)warming story of sweet payback for someone who really had it coming is brought to you by The Muppet Movie, the internet, and one petite but brave Boston lady who likes to practice making scary monster voices in her spare time.

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Reddit user ManichestBreastiny (+10) shared her story with TwoXChromosomes, the site's female-focused subforum. MB was leaving a movie theater in Boston and walking the short distance to the nearest T station when,

A man that looked to be at least fifteen years older than myself who was walking near me in the same direction took an extra step to catch up to me and put his arm around my shoulder and grabbed my breast, and said "Hey".

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Oh, hell no. MB wasn't having any of it, and rather than just taking it, she fought back in an unconventional way. She explains,

I pushed him off me, and in my most threatening bellow yelled, "HOW DARE YOU TOUCH ME?"

Now, before you shrug and say who cares? I yell at street gropers and harassers all the time! there's something you should know about MB. MB likes to practice funny voices, like, as a hobby. One of those funny voices is a scary demon voice. And so when she yelled "HOW DARE YOU TOUCH ME!?" what her attacker heard was this.

His reaction was startled, to say the least.

The guy froze, his mouth open and face in total shock. I knew I caught him by surprise. It took me a few seconds, between him standing funny and the smell to realize that he crapped in his pants.

I looked around, and saw a few other people staring, probably because I had just yelled at someone in a park, and made an awkward walk away from the guy. I was shaken from being grabbed, and got to the Park Street station as fast as I could walk.

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MB proceeded to her train station, as planned.

This girl fucking rules.

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DISCUSSION

When I was in high school and a man pushed his boner against my ass in a crowded train, I said nothing because I was so confused and flustered and I wasn't really sure that what I thought was happening was actually happening. But when I was in my 20s and it happened again and by then I knew the way world worked and I yelled at him to get the hell away from me. And people stared at me like I was a little nutty but I didn't care because he got away.

This lady is awesome. Good for her she had the presence of mind to react the way she did. Sometimes it is hard to stand up for yourself.