"The Grunts" sounds like it should be the name of an unfortunate gastrointestinal condition suffered by sailors in the 1800's. Read more
Erin Gloria Ryan
morninggloria
I'm not an asshole who judges ugly babies; I am a champion of the human race who only wants what's best for everyone else's kids. Thanks, science! Read more
But what if the girls were asking for it? Read more
That reminds me of the one eyed, one legged monster that terrorized Pee Wee and the other Playhouse friends during one Very Special episode. Turns out, the monster was just trying to be friends, but the Playhouse crew didn't realize this until Jombi magicked him the ability to speak English. Read more
Mark Sanford is really a mad scientist working in his secret Atlanta lab to reanimate the corpse of Ronald Reagan. Read more
It seems Fergie has more power than I could have ever imagined. Read more
What in tarnation is Fritos pie? Read more
Silvio Berlusconi appoints extremely unqualified and conventionally attractive women to government positions because he wants to bone them? Sounds like a Mediterranean version of the GOP. Read more
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a shitshow. Read more
@Flackette Goes Retro: Fuck the hell off, you hilariously irate fucker! Read more
I'm working on inventing a car that runs exclusively on shame-power. It's our most infinitely renewable resource, and there's a surplus of it. Read more
@JerseyGrrrl: That sounds horrible and hilarious. Read more
@heatherwritesstuff: Mother father that is bizarre. Read more
My original comment was eaten. Read more
Was she ever on the right side of the shark to begin with? Read more
I'm going to have a memorial service for the last modicrum of respect I had for anyone who calls themselves "pro-life." Read more
Now, I'd like them to apologize for all of the irresponsible things I did in college after going on yet another Bacardi Razz and 7-Up bender. Read more
Don't Undress With Texas. Read more
@dreamweave: I need audio to read. Very loud audio. I shout along with the words in books as I read them. I have personally been banned from all libraries in the state of Illinois. Read more
@Sputnik_Sweetheart: I think almost all modern religions have pagan traditions interwoven with the doctrine. Like the Christ-eating Catholics. Read more