midwesternmom's discussions

Will they title it "The Girl Who Skipped the Number Four?" Read more

Sigh, I always knew Tina Fey would sell out and photoshop her cover. Read more

@MagsCO: Happened to me once, at a New Year's party. Luckily my chignon absorbed most of the liquid. And I later became friends with the girl—go figure—she ended up saner than the guy she was fighting for. Read more

Rory, the Tin Woodsman's younger brother, advertised his personal grooming service as "Follow the Silver Schick Road." Read more

@Apollonia: Given that his mother had fired Tareq from the family business, he probably was disconnected from his family. Read more

@Moretta: [gofugyourself.celebuzz.com] Read more

@OneBigPear: I also love GoodPlasticSurgery. Sometimes celebrities show up on both simultaneously. Read more

@Alibelle: I had the same dirty thought. I feel less ashamed. And I want that sweater. Read more

Off to a Halloween party, and it seems just a little early for me. But it's more for the kids, so I guess we should get them sugar-acclimated early. Read more

Hortense, if you're a good neighbor, you will go disconnect Helen's cable box. I'm pretty sure a Rock-and-Roll Bus marathon will send her into cardiac arrest. Read more

I thought Kristen Chenowith. But she'd have to be on stilts to pull this off. Read more

I shudder to think what Lady Gaga will use for material for her wedding dress. Kittens? Babies? Disgruntled fans? Read more

@HRH Your Cuntness aka likepenguins: Someone has to hold SJP's bag while she's on the red carpet. Read more

@post-hoc: Seriously, I am rubbing myself with crystals just to erase the thought of them. Read more

Um, Michael Lohan, I'm pretty sure your daughter chose the Betty Ford Center solely because they don't have family therapy. And she just increased her chances of having a successful rehabilitation by 1000%. Read more

@keldo: I have been weaving with a yarn made from banana leaf fibers, and it is nice and absorbent. Also fluffier than you would think. Read more

@the.bleach: Get her something lovely and reasonable for her desk. A fun pen, handmade paper notepads, a nice pot with an easy-care plant. Read more

I remember a DEA agent telling about a morning raid on a motorcycle gang back in the eighties. The women sleeping out in the common room were laughing that it was better than the day before, when the gang woke them up by peeing on them. Read more

If they could only cut back Tom Cruise's role in Mission: Impossible 4, it would be incredible casting. I vote that Cruise plays Holloway's personal shirt caddy, in case he wants to perform the entire movie shirtless. Read more

Martha Stewart has hosted SNL—I remember that she was in such a rush to get on stage for her Christmas sketch that she forgot her shirt. Read more