Kelly Faircloth's saved articles

My favorite cookbook (to read) is a vintage 1950s Better Homes and Gardens. It has a chapter on “How To Pack A Man-Sized Lunchbox.” I may need Aunt Jenny’s book to supplement it. Read more

Impressive commitment to dropped g’s and d’s, right out of The Plain Talk Style Guide. Read more

I will swallow your soul in my mouth of gorging evil. Cthulu calls to you.

SO DIGESTIBLE!!! Read more

Unlike Aunt Flo.

The first romance novel I ever read was one of these. All I remember is that Fabio (I mean, not actually him in the novel, but it’s him on the cover) fingers the heroine while riding on his futuristic beast of burden, and seeing the cover and thinking the heroine was all “FABIO YOU’RE SQUISHING MEEEE.” Behold:

I would like a week on a beach, a bottomless cocktail and all of these to go with, please. Read more

Pretty sure I snuck-read every single one of these books while spending weekends at my grandma’s when I was prepubescent. Read more

I READ THIS ONE. I READ THIS ONE.

I just want to say I saw Fabio in the Aquatics section of Petco in Studio City on Sunday and DAMN that man is fine. He even had his shirt open a few buttons too many so I could behold the hint of his abs. I died. Read more

I once bought a friend an antique perfume bottle and smelling salts to put in it. We’re both fancy bitches.
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I this post! My fave gift ever is the china set I found at a thrift store and sent my mom to buy for me. It is the same china that my great grandmother had.

Because usually it is, except in the case of ephemeral stuff like daytime TV, the evening news, etc. You can still get every episode of Bewitched ever made, but not General Hospital.
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Ultimate fancy bitch gift: silk pillowcase
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I was absolutely positive David Hartman was Herman Munster when I was a kid. Read more

I suppose you CAN get a bottle of Yellow Label if you must, but really.. La Grande Dame is the way to go if you are a truly Fancy Bitch. Cheaping out is never a good precedent to set. Read more

Today, leeches are used to prevent blood clotting post-surgery Read more

Heh. This isn’t even all that crazy to me... I work in a medical library and I get a lot of weird donations all the time. Over the years I’ve opened boxes filled with old microscopes, rusty scalpels, a spinal tapping kit, twenty five dental casts, and unknown bottles of possibly poisonous liquid. Basically, I’ve come…

Leech, slug, snail, whatever :)

“Perhaps the mechanical device’s biggest advantage is that it is not a leech,” Read more