Oh, Anderson Cooper. Why do you insist on playing up the “serious newsman” shtick? It’s so clear that your true calling is feigning interest in Kelly Ripa’s children and providing relief from the otherwise insufferable world of morning TV. AC filled in for Regis this morning on Live! With Regis and Kelly, and somehow made a story about going to the dentist for the first time in five years charming rather than gross (probably because he said he loves “getting stoned” on nitrous oxide). In the clip above, Kelly accuses Anderson of being “so straight,” a claim he refutes with a simulated hair flip and Cher impression.