Oh, Anderson Cooper. Why do you insist on playing up the “serious newsman” shtick? It’s so clear that your true calling is feigning interest in Kelly Ripa’s children and providing relief from the otherwise insufferable world of morning TV. AC filled in for Regis this morning on Live! With Regis and Kelly, and somehow made a story about going to the dentist for the first time in five years charming rather than gross (probably because he said he loves “getting stoned” on nitrous oxide). In the clip above, Kelly accuses Anderson of being “so straight,” a claim he refutes with a simulated hair flip and Cher impression.

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Ever since I saw him lambaste professional fraud Sylvia Brown, he stole my heart. I love this man. And he's totally gay, but i respect him wanting to get as little of his personal life involved in the media as possible a) in order to maintain journalistic integrity b) his mom is Gloria friggen Vanderbilt who CONSTANTLY shoved herself and her family in the spotlight and he hated it. As a result, he's incredibly private.