Somewhere in the night, a strong, healthy tree uproots itself, falling to the forest floor with a reverberant thud. A nightingale’s song turns garbled and shrill before she pauses, unsure. A bear wanders out of hibernation early, wading slack-jawed into the nearby tide. Kylie Jenner has given another interview, and the earth shakes in distress.

“I started wigs, and now everyone is wearing wigs,” Kylie said, erroneously, in an excerpt from an upcoming Marie Claire cover story. The May “Fresh Faces” issue features Zendaya, Gugu Mbatha-Raw, Ellie Goulding, Kylie Jenner, and Hailey Baldwin (whose teaser quotes are categorized under “on dating Justin Bieber” and “on her feelings,” because that is just about it for Hailey Baldwin).

But back to Kylie:

On her ability to influence others and have fun with it: “I started wigs, and now everyone is wearing wigs. Kim [Kardashian] just used my wig guy last night...I just do whatever I want to do, and people will follow.”

On posting photos on social media: “When I post sexy photos, I always regret it. Like, Oh my God, everyone is seeing my body. I get really weird about it.”

HALT RIGHT THERE, GIRL. Kylie Jenner “started wigs” much in the same way that I “started” ripped jeans from Urban Outfitters, i.e., she just wears them, and no one really cares.

Below, in random order, a list of notable people who wore wigs before Kylie Jenner did:

  • Cher
  • The ancient Egyptians
  • James Madison
  • Black women in the 1900's
  • Black women in the 1910's
  • Black women in the 1920's
  • Black women in the 1930's
  • Black women in the 1940's
  • Katy Perry
  • Black women in the 1950's
  • Nicki Minaj
  • Black women 1960's-present
  • Lady Gaga
  • Natalie Portman in Closer
  • Karen Huger
  • Some black men and women enslaved in the eighteenth century who worked inside plantation houses
  • Queen Elizabeth I
  • Rihanna
  • Beyoncé
  • Hasidic Jewish women
  • Me, when I was in LA one time
  • Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction
  • Tyra Banks
  • Marie Antoinette
  • Regina George
  • Lisa Rinna (rumored)

Bold move, Kylie.


Image via Getty.