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And Now, Cooking With Beefcake

Cooking With Beefcake is an old VHS tape that's come back to life thanks to the internet (and the good people at EIT). It stars a woman who could easily be Blanche Devereaux's long-lost sister, spouting out phrases like "cocktail time!" as she prepares meals in a kitchen filled with hunky, shirtless dudes (who wear aprons that give a clear view of both their abs and their rear ends.) NSFW, mind you.

[Everything Is Terrible!]

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Oh my God. This is exactly what my retirement will be like. With the addition of several cats and the replacement of the wine glass with a gin gimlet.