Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth
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Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth

Alleged Child Molester Still Refuses to Concede Alabama Special Election

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In a completely unnecessary video released on Wednesday night, alleged pedophile Roy Moore announced that he will not concede to Democrat Doug Jones, who won Alabama’s special election for US Senate on Tuesday evening.

“In this race, we have not received the final count to include military and provisional ballots,” Moore said. “This has been a very close race and we are awaiting certification by the secretary of state.”

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“After the election of Donald Trump a little over a year ago, I saw a window of hope and an opportunity that we could return to our founding principles,” he continued. “Today we no longer recognize the universal truth: that God is the author of our life and liberty. Abortion, sodomy, and materialism have taken the place of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”

By an unofficial tally, Jones earned 49.9 percent of the vote, clearing the 1 percent margin that would have demanded a recount. Moore received 48.3 percent of the vote. Alabama Secretary of State John Merrill says it’s “highly unlikely” that Jones won’t be declared the certified winner of the election.

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Still, Moore believes that God is on his side and will turn him into a winner. As he said on election night, “That’s what we’ve got to do, is wait on God and let this process play out.” But if not to the Senate, where will God take Roy Moore next? Hopefully not a high school or a mall.