OK, we need to walk through what just happened. I think it was Jodie Foster refusing to come out as she came out, and then retiring. I think? I was crying, but I wasn't sure why, and then I was laughing, but I wasn't sure why. I think maybe Jodie Foster felt the same way. Also, she was possibly kinda drunk.

I know Foster was speaking out against all of the speculation about her sexuality ‚ÄĒ and famous people's sexuality in general ‚ÄĒ and how it's nobody's business. Which it isn't, but also, how can we not talk about what just went down? It sounds like she endured a pretty traumatic break-up recently, and is in a place of new beginnings, and I'm down to support the authentic Jodie Foster in whatever she does. Let's do this, Foster.

Just: Damn. A roller coaster ride of a speech, my friends.