As if the cries of "Ten points for Gryffindor!" every time she answers a question in lecture correctly aren't humiliating enough, Emma Watson, returning to Brown to resume her studies in the winter semester, was stopped and questioned by customs at the passport desk at JFK because they thought she was an unaccompanied minor.
An "insider" (a janitor? A keychain on Emma's backpack? Neville Longbottom?) says: "Emma was mortified. Not only did they not know who she was they thought she was a child. It was very embarrassing but she managed to awkwardly laugh it off." Fuck it though, backpacks are hella practical, so who cares? [Glamour]
In an uncharacteristically classy turn of events (that's realistically most likely a savvy moneymaking move), Kimye have turned down a $3 million offer from a foreign tabloid for their spawn's first pictures. (For perspective: Brangelina got $4.1 million for Shiloh; a whopping $14 million for the twins.) They are probably just waiting for the bids to escalate, but they also rejected the idea of featuring the baby on Keeping Up With The Kardashians, so maybe they're turning over a new...? Nah. [TMZ]
There is a quite exciting rumor that Adele, who has been laying low since the birth of her baby in October, will be making her comeback at the February 24th Oscars ceremony as part of a special tribute to the 50th anniversary of the James Bond franchise. The theme to "Skyfall" is also predicted to garner a nomination for Best Original Song. [Marie Claire UK]
Today in I Can't Believe Alexander Payne Didn't Write This, George Clooney is going on a road trip with his close friend Rande Gerber (who is also Cindy Crawford's husband), to promote their new venture, Casamigos Tequila. The genesis of this business plan? "George and Rande came up with the idea of creating their own house tequila years ago when they both built houses in Mexico." And here is Smirkface Silverfox singing with Neil Diamond/jumping his own shark. [Page Six, The Spirits Business]
Lena Dunham is a human, likes free swag.
"They actually send [free clothes] to me in my size. No one is being an a—hole and sending them to me in a size 4. They are sending me clothes, they fit, and what people should know is that I always wear them. Somehow even if I would not have bought it, the fact that it was free and my grandma's depression-era mentality make me think it's the most beautiful piece I have ever owned, and I wear it for several days straight."
Lena Dunham has incendiary thoughts and feelings:
"I think we can all agree with the idea that the beautiful girls that get all the boys get written about. They don't usually write."
- Justin Bieber's people are arguing in light of the recent weed-smoking shots that any photos taken by people partying with The B33bz are his property. [TMZ]
- Also, he just got the Stratford Cutillions logo inked on his shoulder blade as a tribute to his grandpa, who always took him to the games. [E!]
- Real Housewife of Orange County Vicki Gunvalson broke her neck during a ski trip but is otherwise OK. [TMZ]
- Although it may appear that his life is in a tailspin, alleged wifebeater Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson is still pulling in $66,000 a month. A MONTH, guys. [TMZ]
- Buzz Aldrin has officially divorced his third wife, so get all up ons, ladies! [TMZ]
- M.I.A.'s next album has been delayed because the studio thinks it's "too positive." [Vulture]
- Diana Ross stormed out of La Scala in Beverly Hills when she couldn't get a table, bringing the Official Diana Ross Storming-Out-Of-Places Tally to approximately a buttload of times. [Page Six]
- Kat Dennings and Nikki Reed fulfilled everyone's 5th grade dream and starred in a Hanson video:
- Rupert Everett: "I was a slut. I loved sex. You were told [at school] that if you got a hard-on, you should turn over and a say a Hail Mary. [But] My whole life was about sex, really, in one sense or another.'' He also mentions that he used to sleep with Sir Ian McKellen. [tv3.ie]
- Courteney Cox says she's still best friends with David Arquette. [People]
- Nicki Minaj and Adam Levine are on the verge of creating two major mass-market lines of fashion, accessories and housewares for somewhere "along the lines of Kmart, Walmart or Target." [Page Six]
- Dave Letterman told Oprah that he's been in therapy since he admitted to numerous extramarital affairs in 2009. "For a long time, I thought I was a decent guy, but yet, thinking I was a decent guy, I was still capable of behavior that wasn't coincidental to living a decent life... and that's what I'm working on." [NY Post]
- Mariah Carey's ex-husband Tommy Mottola wrote a skeezy-sounding tell-all. [Radar Online]
- Now is the time to buy Pippa Middleton's much-mocked book Celebrate because it is 75% off and don't you want to learn how to make ice cubes? [Radar Online]