Nobody’s saying that your Thanksgiving wasn’t riddled with awkward family moments, like when your uncle maybe announced that dinner was officially over by farting and shouting above the din of polite conversation, “Exeunt!” It’s just that Halle Berry‘s Thanksgiving was probably way more awkward, and would be even if, instead of reporting that her current fiancé Olivier Martinez and ex-husband Gabriel Aubry came to blows in Berry’s driveway, TMZ didn’t even identify the combatants and merely stated that two irate Frenchmen wrestled each other desperately as Berry and her daughter Nahla looked on.
According to law enforcement officials, Aubry was arrested Thanksgiving morning after he and Martinez got into a physical altercation in Berry’s driveway when Aubry showed up to pick up his daughter Nahla as per his custodial rights. While Aubry waited for Nahla to come outside, Martinez strolled over to the car and said something to the effect of, “Mon ami, we need to be cool with each other. For the petite cherie.” Aubry then pushed Martinez, and, after some scuffling of which he presumably got the worst of, went to the hospital with a broken rib, facial contusions, and a possibly more serious head injury (witnesses have been unable to confirm further instigating particulars because the two men were apparently exchanging French insults). Martinez eventually went to the same hospital to be treated for minor injuries. After his release from the hospital, Aubry “was booked for private persons arrest for battery,” according to an LAPD spokesperson, and a judge issued an emergency protective order requiring Aubrey to stay at least 100 feet from Berry, Nahla, and Martinez. [TMZ, People]
- Halle Berry’s Thanksgiving may have been thoroughly terrible, but Kim Kardashian and Kanye West went out in public and hugged each other pretty hard…with their mouths. [E!]
- In news that is not all that, Kenan Thompson and Kel Mitchell won’t be mouth-hugging or even good-burgering anytime soon — Kel says that Kenan is trying real hard to disassociate himself from his old, wiry partner in comedy, which is a shame because I think everyone was still hoping that they’d reunite and become the next Abbott and Costello. Sadly, it is not to be. [TMZ]
- Chris Brown denies that protesters scared him away from performing in Guyana. He’s scared of a recent dengue fever outbreak, no doubt, because dengue fever is terrifying. [E!]
- So Justin Bieber organized a string of magical dates with Selena Gomez — swan-tunnel, ice-skating on an empty rink while the Zamboni driver played “Come Sail Away” on an electric guitar, a picnic on a giant floating lily pad — and now she totally forgives him for hanging out with a Victoria’s Secret model. At least that’s what the kids are all saying. [The Sun]
- Susan Boyle would like Julie Walters to play her in an upcoming Susan Boyle biopic, thank you very much. [Express]
- Matthew Morrison says that being in the boy band LMNT sucked because “singing and dancing to stupid, ridiculous songs didn’t feed my soul.” Doing that on Glee, however, is much more spiritually nourishing. [Express]
- Elle Macpherson‘s ex-boyfriend Jeffrey Soffer reportedly survived a deadly helicopter crash in the Bahamas that killed a passenger and injured four others, including Soffer. [NYDN]
- Anne Hathaway says that her Les Mis 19th century French prostitute diet left her so hungry at night that she couldn’t sleep. [Express]
- It’s Snooki‘s 25th birthday! [E!]
- It’s Vincent Cassel‘s 46th birthday, which I only mention because it seems like we just don’t hear enough about Vincent Cassel. [WOW]
- Bjork underwent successful throat surgery (ick) to have a polyp (ick) removed from her vocal cords. Doesn’t a polyp sound like a tubular little creature that lives under your refrigerator and comes out after you go to sleep to vacuum up all the breadcrumbs you left out on the counter? [BBC]
- Adele‘s music has been voted the most popular music to curl up on on a soft surface and fall into a deep, dreamless sleep chasm to. [NME]