As is the case with many a dad/manager, I could have told you something was going on with former youth pastor and Baptist minister Joe Simpson. All those icky comments about daughter Jessica's breasts? That DUI he got in Sherman Oaks in August? His divorce from Tina, his wife of 34 years, late last month? Supposedly, that "something" is that Joe came out of the closet to his family two months ago and told them it wasn't fair to anyone to keep denying his interest in men. A source close to the family says that the 54-year-old Simpson is now involved with a 20-year-old man. Cue awkwardest Simpson family Christmas ever. [Radar Online]

Kate and Pippa Middleton had a row over Pippa's desire to do promos with every major talk show in New York in order to push her entertaining book Celebrate, which Buckingham Palace disapproves of because they're afraid that Le Derriere will be questioned about K8's nude scandal. When the Palace put the kibosh on Pippa's TV appearances, Kate had to break the news to her sister. She asked Prince William to come along, but he refused. It did not go well. They fought and hugged, but Kate fears their relationship won't be the same now. Orrrr this is the National Enquirer and I bet none of it happened. [National Enquirer]

Christina Applegate and her fiance Martyn LeNoble are being harassed and threatened by a crazy Twitter stalker. "You stole [Christina] away from me. If not for you she would be mine. I will not accept this. I am going to kill you!!!!!!!!!" The LAPD is working to obtain a warrant for Twitter headquarters in San Francisco. [TMZ]

Promotional images of Megan Fox modeling in gossamer drawers for a Sharper Image ad campaign, shot in April (while Fox was five months pregnant with her new son Noah), have been released in an exclusive preview by Us Weekly. The first time Fox modeled for the brand was in the spring. "I have always been a bit of a gadget geek and into different types of technology," she said. "The campaign is a good fit for me because I love electronics." I mean, the marketing campaign is called "Guys Love Gadgets," but otay. Click through for shots. [Us Weekly]

Prince had a secret concert in L.A., so don't be surprised when everyone in America wakes up mysteriously pregnant. [Page Six]

The first shot of Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel's WEDDDDDINNGGGG. [People]

  • Downton Abbey's Michelle Dockery broke up with her boyfriend. [Us Weekly]
  • Eva Longoria and Mark Sanchez also split. [NYDN]
  • "She's still naughty in sexual ways. I mean this is not exactly an Angel of Mercy." —Brad Pitt on Angelina Jolie. YEAH WE GET IT, BRAD. [Page Six]
  • Kate Moss gives decorating advice to One Directioner Harry Styles, whose inclinations otherwise would run to "Legos!" and "peanut butter handprints!" [Monsters and Critics]
  • Rihanna and Chris Brown went as a pair to Breezy's new website launch party in Beverly Hills. The URL is [SFGate]
  • Meanwhile, Brown's ex Karrueche Tran still wants him back. I've asked this once, and I'll ask it again: IS Chris Brown's penis made of magic? [TMZ]
  • Bobby Brown got his second DUI on Wednesday. [Radar Online]
  • New ANTM judge Rob Evans is wanted for assault with a deadly weapon. Smize for the mugshot! [TMZ]
  • Michelle Williams leaves her former home with Heath Ledger to move in with Jason Segel. [Daily Mail]
  • Madonna ate it during a Dallas concert. [VH1]
  • Apparently Michael Lohan tried to get Dr. Drew involved in the whole Let's Make Lindsay Go To Rehab thing, but he declined. [TMZ]
  • LiLo also stole $15k of clothes from the Scary Movie 5 set. Kind of amazing their costume budget was that high. [Radar Online]
  • Ann Coulter, considered an articulate force by many of the right wing, won't stop using the word "retard" no matter how many people tell her to. [TMZ]
  • This one jumpsuit Jennifer Lopez wears during her concerts always produces a nipple slip! Every time. [E!]
  • Drew Barrymore strolllllled around with her husband Will Koppelman after popping out daughter Olive in late September. [People]
  • Susan Sarandon is ambivalent about marriage, she told Katie Couric. [People]
  • Some girl from Teen Mom 2 is pregnant with her third child. [Us Weekly]
  • Emma Watson's gonna be back at Brown in the winter. [Us Weekly]
  • Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend Erin Heatherton got cramps and couldn't go to an event at Cipriani where DiCaprio's ex Bar Rafaeli was supposed to be. [NYDN]
  • Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez's friendship was cauterized by simultaneous Jonas brothers breakups. Thug lyfe. [Hollywood Life]