Weddings are pretty boring, aren't they? They can be boring, anyway, especially if they don't have most/all of the following: horses, puppies, fireworks, ice cream, open bars, one uncle who is an awesome drunk dancer, one uncle who is a terrible drunk dancer, one aunt who dances by slowly hiking up her skirt, a crying child, a bartender who "wanders," a mime, another mime that politely informs whoever's in charge that the original mime is an imposter, a grandparent who pretends to be interested in your career only to ask towards the end of the night when you plan on getting married, someone who unsuccessfully tries to start a conga line, someone who successfully starts the electric slide, general crying, and one good appetizer that everyone but you seems to sample.

via HuffPo