Even though she has her own program (on which she admits she's doing a terrible job disciplining her son, who utters words the FCC won't allow) Bristol Palin just can't get enough of the spotlight. The cast of Dancing With The Stars: All Stars has been announced, and your girl BriPal (Brilin?) is number one on the list of names, alongside Pamela Anderson, Kelly Monaco, Melissa Rycroft, Shawn Johnson, Kirstie Alley, Joey Fatone, Helio Castroneves, Drew Lachey, Emmitt Smith, Apolo Ohno and Gilles Marini. Can't wait to see what kind of songs Bristol will boogie to this time — last year she shimmied to "Mama Told Me Not To Come." [NYDN]

Sad news: Lupe Ontiveros, the Texas-born actress best known for roles in Selena and The Goonies (she was Rosalita), died today of liver cancer at the age of 69. In 2009, she spoke about how she'd played a maid 300 times.

"You'd say, 'You want an accent?' And they'd say, 'Yes, we prefer for you to have an accent.' And the thicker and more waddly it is, the more they like it… I long to play a judge. I long to play a lesbian woman. I long to play a councilman, someone with some chutzpah."

But she also told LA Weekly: "I've had a hell of a good time playing those maids… No matter how much I resent the stupidity that is written into them, the audacity that the industry has when they portray us in such a nonsensical, idiotic, such - oh my God! - such a degrading manner, still, my humor survives in these maids," she said. "I'm very proud of them." [Vulture]

Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis have one of those insipid nicknames, and it is Ashmi. They are together, like, for real. [Hollyscoop]

What do you think housekeeping found after Lady Gaga, Lindsay Lohan and Ellen Von Unwerth spent the night at the Chateau Marmont? [NYDN]

Michael Sanders, father of director Rupert Sanders, says everyone needs to calm the fuck down about his son embracing and kissing Kristen Stewart: "From what I gather nothing really happened and it is all a lot of fuss about nothing. I should imagine it was something very brief," he said. "She is a very pretty girl and when you work that closely with someone for so long, sometimes things happen." [People]
Here are more pix of Kristen Stewart being embraced by Rupert Sanders. [Yeeeah]

Do you have thoughts about Jennifer Lopez's brightly colored and desperately frantic new video? Because I can't form thoughts, except that I feel bad for the wolf dogs. [NYDN]

Do you like that show The Killing? Yeah? Well it's been canceled. Sorry. [TVLine, LA Times Show Tracker]

BREAKING: Sofia Vergara's bra size is 32F. Yes, this is news. [Wow Report, Just Jared, via Allure]

  • Let's take a moment and absorb the fact that there is a new couple in Celebland. Pizza-sharing lovers Katy Perry and John Mayer, who shared a pizza while they were sharing a pizza together over the pizza that they were sharing. Together. In bed. [Us]
  • Justin Bieber has a filthy mouth, and a fellow airline passenger had to tell him the expletives he was spouting were inappropriate. This is what happens when your guardian is named Scooter. Ill-mannered. [TMZ]
  • Hans Zimmer, who composed the music for The Dark Knight Rises, has announced a new song called "Aurora" dedicated to the victims of the Colorado theater shooting. [MTV]
  • How hungry are you for the new album Duran Duran will be making after the Olympics? Hungry like the fox? Hungry like the tiger? No, you're hungry like the Canis lupus, which, according to Wikipedia, "is a species of canid native to the wilderness and remote areas of North America, Eurasia, and North Africa." [L.A. Times]
  • Dr. Conrad Murray has invited Katherine Jackson to come visit him in jail. Cough. [ABC News]
  • Chris Brown got into a fight? How odd. What uncharacteristic behavior. [NYDN]
  • If you're feeling like things cannot get worse, you're wrong: Paris Hilton has a crush on Chris Brown. [Radar]
  • Shit, who knew Gladys Knight was so scary? [TMZ]
  • My pretend boyfriend bought us a new house. [Radar]
  • Remember how The Game canceled his wedding? Well it's back on. Hopefully you didn't return your gift. [TMZ]
  • Emily The Bachelorette is gonna take Jef With One F's last name, not that you give a fuck. [People]
  • Twitter was down on Thursday, and it might have been because those glazed petit fours from One Direction were trying to have a Twitcam sesh. Cute boys ruin everything. [MTV News]
  • Krayzie Bone from Bone Thugs (where else?) has been busted for drunk driving. See you at the crossroads. [TMZ]
  • Really don't picture Jay-Z drinking a beer, but here he is narrating a spot for Budweiser's Made in America Festival. [The Life Files]
  • Best wishes to Darlene Love, who is recovering from a heart attack. [AP]
  • MTV is bringing back Daria! For like, a few days. But still. [Pop Candy]
  • Not celeb-related but OMG WHITE LION CUBS! [Buzzfeed]