Rebecca Adlington, a two-time gold medalist swimmer (which means, in Nat Geo terms, that she falls somewhere on the scale of aquatic agility between a seahorse and a triggerfish), has decided to quit Twitter for the duration of the summer Olympics because some people hate themselves so much that they use the mask of social media to unfairly snark on guileless celebrities. Celebrities like Adlington, who boasts almost 50,000 followers and regularly posts training pictures and personal updates.
That's all over, at least for the ensuing climactic months of Adlington's Olympic training regimen. She told the AP that she'd be avoding Twitter until the games are over because some people — and we're not pointing fingers, but if you're reading this, now is the time to bask like a reptile in your shame — have criticized the way she looks and she'd rather not deal with such added stress ahead of a crazy important athletic competition. Adlington further explained, "Even if there are 10 nice comments, you get one idiot. I can't help the way I look … but that has nothing to do with my swimming."
Elsewhere along the Twitter telephone cable, more users are swiveling their heads to Lolo Jones, most likely under the false impression that her disembodied vagina will be competing in the chastity Olympics this summer.