Here's a thing to ponder for the rest of your evening: what unspeakable stinky dick thing has afflicted this guy in this promo for Boink, the social media app that matches you with people based on your sexual compatibility? Buttsecks gone awry? A Roman or golden shower? I'm confused by this ad.

Here's what we do know about Boink: it allows users to enter their sexual proclivities into their android phones. Do you like doggy style? How about girl on top? How about sex that results in a smelly ween? Tell your phone, and the app will generate a profile for you. Then, when you're drunk and around someone else who has the Boink app, bang your phones together and your phones will tell you whether or not the two of you should bang. Then laugh awkwardly. Then make out.

Spoiler alert: if you're at the point where you're banging phones with someone, you're probably already on the fast track to bang city.

The people who brought you Boink are also responsible for an app that warns dudes when their girlfriends are about to have their period (and everyone knows that when women have their periods, they ~gO*cRaZy!*~). So, it's all science-based.