According to a new study, plastic surgery can actually make you look five to nine years younger — but to get the maximum benefit, you need a whole bunch of different procedures. Which gets pretty expensive. Let's break down those costs a bit, shall we?
According to CBS's HealthPop, the study asked impartial bodysnarkers to guess the age of sixty middle-aged folks before and after plastic surgery. On average, surgery shaved 8.9 years off these guess. But for the greatest fountain-of-youth effect, subjects needed a face and neck lift, an eyelid job, and a forehead lift. We priced those to see how much youth you can get for your buck. Turns out, looking young is expensive in relation to normal daily necessities. But compared to some supposedly youth-restoring indulgences, it could be a bargain:
Face/neck lift, average US cost (as of 2007): $5,031
Eyelid surgery: $3,134
Forehead lift: $3,092
Cost, per year of youth regained: $1,295.17
Median gross monthly rent in US, as of 2007: $789
Number of years you can take off your face in exchange for one month's rent: 0.61 — that is, one month's rent buys you about 7 face-months
Average student loan debt of American graduating seniors in 2010: $25,250, or 19.5 face-years. If they'd gotten plastic surgery instead of going to college, graduating seniors could look like toddlers!
Cost for a 45-year-old to look like a graduating senior: $31,084
Cost of a new Porsche 911 Carrera 4S convertible: $109,400.00
Cost of an 18-day Eat, Pray, Love-inspired trip to India, not including airfare: $19,795. It's not clear how many years this takes off (or adds to?) your spiritual age, but its cost in face-years is 15.3. For that price, a middle-aged person could be a thirty-something again.
Average cost of an extramarital affair in 2003: $20,639 for four months, which works out to $61,917 for a full year
Number of face-years you could subtract for the cost of a year-long affair: 47.8. So plastic surgery is actually a more cost-effective remedy for a midlife crisis than adultery. For the cost of a yearlong affair, a middle-aged person could get right back to zero.
Chucky mask, so you can look like an ageless murderous doll-child forever: $20.82. This is the most cost-effective option of all.
Image via Shutterstock.com.