Great news, fully realized, super advanced fetuses who are reading this: the Oklahoma Senate today overwhelmingly passed a law that defines a "person" as a human life that begins from the moment of conception.
The mostly Republican legislative body passed the measure 34-8. That means that only 8 state Senators in Oklahoma are not fucking morons.
Once this is signed into law by the state's Republican governor Mary Fallin, abortions will be illegal, as well as many forms of contraception and Plan B. Hooray!
It seems only appropriate that during this week of Valentine's Day, Republican legislators across the country would show how much they love women by passing laws requiring them to get vaginal probes before having abortions, or stating an official preference for the dumb whims of a developing fetus over the conscious will of the woman carrying the fetus.
I can't wait to see what they come up with for the week of Mother's Day. A law requiring women who haven't given birth to children by age 35 be sent to labor camps? Can't wait!
OK Senate Passes Personhood Act, Effectively Banning Abortion [AddictingInfo]