Way back in October of 2010, a certain performance artist/actor had just published his debut collection of short stories, we were getting ready to witness the holy (alas, ill-fated) union between a comedian and a pop star, and the world's cutest dog was discovered. And, lo, those many months ago, it was the last time we saw Don Draper's perfect mug (and other parts of his perfect body) doing something so wrong it's right: proposing to secretary/gorgeous woman with maternal instincts, Megan.

In our world, so much has changed since then (though the dog is still cute)...but what about in the Mad Men world? What have Joan, Roger, Pete, Trudy, Lane, Sally, and everyone else been up to? Is Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce back on its feet after Lucky Strike's departure? Has Joan given birth to Roger's child? Have Don and Megan already celebrated their perfect nuptials and departed for Aruba wearing matching honeymoon suits?

Thankfully, we'll find out soon, when the drought of 60s-nostalgia and irresistibly naughty behavior ends with the return of Mad Men. Its long-awaited Season 5 premieres on March 25 on AMC. The secrets are back, as is the backstabbing jealousy, nearly unbearable sexiness, and outright adultery. And a nation cannot wait.