Bradley Cooper has conceded that he might not be the Sexiest Men Alive. Though the research of the groundbreaking scientists over at People suggests otherwise, he says his dreamboat-in-waiting Ryan Gosling is totally dishier. "There was such a backlash to when they announced it and Ryan Gosling, who I love and I just did a movie with him - he's the greatest - but we were both in Paris this last week and a friend of mine showed me … photographs from the paparazzi - and when I say friend, I mean me, alone in my room, looking at the computer," he said on The Graham Norton Show. "And it's like him walking around and he literally looks like he's in a photoshoot, like he just came off the runway, like the pea coat is like this with the scarf. There are ones of me, and I literally look like the neighbor who never really comes out of his house, and when he does, you're like, ‘Maybe you should just stay in.'" In related news, Bradley Cooper gay rumors resurface. [MSNBC]

Cheating normally causes break-ups, but Candace Bushnell's ahead of the curve and split from husband Charles Askegard before learning of his affair with fellow ballet dancer Georgina Pazcoguin. As the inspiration behind Carrie Bradshaw, it makes sense that the writer work through her pain with a modern retelling of ballerina slaughter-fest Suspiria – think Argento with cosmos. [Page Six]

Sarah Jessica Parker wins points (seriously) for stating the obvious: kids can make a marriage sucky. "Kids can really distract you from your relationship," she said. "Maybe in good ways and bad ways. It's important to have all eyes on all parts of the relationship." Preach. [US]

Unsurprisingly, Johnny Depp has come under fire from Christian groups for lending his voice to Babybird "Jesus Stag Night Club." Which, as far as anyone can tell, is about a bunch if teenagers hiring a Jesus lookalike for a Hangover-level stag night – only realizing it is the real Jebus when he dies. [E!]

It's that time of the month again, when magazine editors debate whether or not Kate Middleton is having her period. And it appears she will be saving on Tampax yet again with news that she's royally knocked up – cue Judd Apatow feverishly typing up the treatment for a zany stately sequel. [NYDN]

  • Girl and 'mo crush Rosario Dawson breaks hearts by dating Bryan Ferry's son Otis. [Janet Charlton]
  • Want to see pictures of Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds kissing at a bed and breakfast in Utah? No? Tough titties. [TMZ]
  • If you needed further proof that Kim Kardashian is an absolute piece of shit, she called her sister Khloe – who has been open about how the family's criticism of her body and looks upset her – an "evil, ugly little troll." [US]
  • A team of experts who specialise in putting a price on your baby's head says Jessica Simpson can't expect much from hers. [HuffPo]
  • Less Than Perfect star Sara Rue heads up a new "faux-lesbian" comedy — so many possibilities, most of them offensive. [THR]
  • Helen Mirren donates the red swimsuit that showed you can be sexy at 60 to charity. [Contact Music]
  • Find out who profits most from Amy Winehouse's death. A clue: it isn't as hideous as it sounds. [E!]
  • Hot piece Ryan Kwanten will be wooing Zooey Deschanel in a Valentine's Day episode of New Girl. [E!]
  • Christie Brinkley says the $500,000 she owes the IRS was an oversight and she'll make it right – sowwy! [Page Six]
  • They'd have us believe that Brad Pitt's Jennifer Aniston-loving parents think Angelina Jolie is the antichrist. Happy smiles suggest otherwise. [US]
  • Never fear, Jennifer has gotten her claws into Justin Theroux's dad. [US]
  • Serena and Venus Williams look like they're having a blast – karaoke style! [TMZ]
  • In a surprisingly undouchey move, Pauly D left a waitress a $500 tip. [Page Six]
  • Robert Downey Jr. likes dressing up as a woman. [E!]
  • The title of Taylor Armstrong's new tell-all book just made my day: "Hiding From Reality." [People]
  • Karina Smirnoff dances away from her fiancé Brad Penny. [US]
  • Phew! The letter that threatened to tear apart the relationship between Oprah and Gayle King – that you, like myself, are probably only hearing about now – is a fake. [E!]
  • Reese Witherspoon, Cameron Diaz and Gwyneth Paltrow discuss blonde world domination over cocktails. [US]
  • Miley Cyrus sung her little whisky and cigarettes-sounding heart out at Trevor Live! A benefit that raises money for The Trevor Project, the national suicide prevention hotline for LGBTQ youth. [E!]
  • Kimberly Stewart takes her new bub for some fresh air and lunch with ex-boyfriend and dad-to-be Jack Osbourne. [E!]
  • Jennifer Saunders says she used anti-depressants to help battle the depression that accompanied her breast cancer. [The Sun]
  • Charlie Sheen is the lesser of two parenting evils this time around, flying back from Colombia to look after his kids after Brooke Mueller was arrested for cocaine possession. [TMZ]