It is so easy to mock Twilight and its fans, what with the vampire who sparkles and doesn't actually bite anyone and the chick who loves the way he never gets charged for breaking and entering and lurking uninvited in her bedroom. But the franchise is still a juggernaut: Despite all of Disney's marketing and folks' nostalgic love of Kermit and Miss Piggy, the Muppets were steamrolled at the box office over the holiday weekend, with Breaking Dawn taking the top spot for the second week in a row. In fact, the flick has a world wide box office total of $488,832,009. Very nearly half a billion dollars.

And now, according to TMZ, fans are "secretly lying about being engaged" so that they can try on the $799 replica of Bella's wedding dress. The report does not cite any sources or witnesses, but as rom coms and Sex And The City have taught us, pretending to be engaged so that you can admire yourself in a white floofy gown is right up there with dotting your Is with hearts on the list of "stuff chicks do."

But you know, a recent study revealed that while women buy 50% of the tickets to movies, we make up only 32.8% of the speaking roles. As Melissa Silverstein of Women And Hollywood notes, "That's 2.05 males characters for each female character." As a movie, Breaking Dawn is tedious and dull, but as a phenomenon, Twilight — with books and screenplays written by women and an enthusiastic, female-driven fandom — at the very least proves that women should be taken seriously as an audience, and deserve to be represented in flicks with equal screen time and speaking roles. So fuck it, ladies, buy yourselves the official engagement ring and try on that dress. And don't forget the replica hair comb.

'Twilight' Fans Fake Engagements To Try on Bella Dress [TMZ]
Women Make Up Only 33% of Speaking Roles in Films [Women And Hollywood]
Breaking Dawn [Box Office Mojo]

Earlier: Here's Your Minute-By-Minute Play-By-Play Of Twilight: Breaking Dawn