Hey girl, here's your hero talking about the fight he broke up on the New York City streets that surfaced last month. He says it was "sad" because the fight was between an artist and a fan of the artist who was too poor to purchase one of the pieces, so said fan stole the piece: "so he finally steals the painting and he's getting his ass kicked by his hero, and then the guy from The Notebook shows up and makes it even weirder. And the whole thing, nobody won." Wrong! The internet won.

As for the guns-a-blazing, manpri getup he was sporting? "I had just come from the gymnasium." Not the gym. The gymnasium. Call it by its proper name, you know?