Jon Hamm drank like an early 1960s ad man at his 40th birthday party! Lorne Michaels, Kristen Wiig, Paul Rudd, Sarah Silverman and Hamm's girlfriend, actress Jennifer Westfeldt, were in attendance. Unfortunately, Peggy Olson wasn't there, and we can neither confirm nor deny that Don Draper cried and puked on himself [Gatecrasher]

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It sounds like a scene from a romcom, but it's real! Two young ladies dressed as housekeepers and sneaked into Justin Bieber's hotel suite in Liverpool. "Having been allowed in, the girls began half-heartedly polishing tables and dusting surfaces." They eventually made it to the bedroom, where they started giggling and taking pictures of his personal shit, and that's when someone in The Beebs' entourage realized something was up and kicked the ladies out. In the romcom version he would fall for one of the chicks, because they are Maid For Each Other. [Contact Music]

Miley Cyrus, who is 18 and not of legal drinking age in California, was spotted stumbling drunkenly into Chateau Marmont on Saturday night. Maybe she was just tired? Maybe it was past her bedtime? [The Superficial]

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Breaking: Lindsay Lohan has quit smoking. [TMZ]
There is, allegedly, "shocking" and "devastating" information in Lindsay Lohan's probation report that has never been made public. Guesses made at the link include prostitution, physical violence, and "pimping her underage sister." [Blind Gossip]

  • Jessica Biel has been smiling and partying now that she's broken up with Justin Timberlake. Freedom! [x17]
  • And! Mila Kunis is all, don't look at me, Justin Timberlake and I are just friends, and even though we're in a movie called Friends With Benefits, we don't have the benefits part, and even if we did, we wouldn't tell you, okay? [People]
  • Heidi Klum and Kim Kardashian were among the celebs to get dolled up in retro duds for Eva Longoria's '20s-inspired birthday party. [Just Jared]
  • Trying to take a picture of Jake Gyllenhaal in the bathroom is a crappy thing to do. [TMZ]
  • This anecdote is supposedly about how James Franco was a method actor even back in his Freaks and Geeks days, but really reveals he was physically violent to Busy Phillips. [Vulture]
  • Pete Wentz, whose mom is part Jamaican, has stopped straightening his hair. He's embracing his roots! (The singer has Tweeted, "it's natural and my kid likes it.") Meanwhile, he and Ashlee went to In-N-Out together on Saturday. Making nice for the kid? [Just Jared]
  • Did Ryan Phillippe cheat on Amanda Seyfried with a woman who is now pregnant? [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]
  • Charlie Sheen's twins turn two years old today. They had a party yesterday, to which Chuckles was not invited. It was a "lavish" affair hosten by Kathy Hilton. [People, Us Magazine]
  • Chuckles has a tour and it sold out in 18 minutes? I'm awake, but the nightmare is still happening all around me. [TMZ]
  • Kanye West is performing at South by Southwest on March 19. Where ever there are hipsters, Yeezy will be there! [Idolator]
  • The Kennedys — starring Katie Holmes, among others — will premiere on ReelzChannel on April 3, although only 20% of the allotted advertising space has been sold. I have a lot of channels, many of them shitty, and yet I have no idea what ReelzChannel is. [Digital Spy]
  • 50 Cent made a terrible unfunny Japan earthquake joke on Twitter, and then wrote, "some of my Tweets are ignorant I do it for shock value." At least he's self-aware? [Digital Spy]
  • Usher sex tape: Do not want. Kind of sweet that it's actually his then-wife in the video, though. [TMZ]
  • "Teen Mom War!" Eyeroll. [E!]
  • A warrant has been issued for Michael Madsen's arrest. Mr. Blond failed to show up for a hearing in his child/spousal support case. FYI: Did you know that he's Virginia Madsen's brother? [TMZ]
  • Richard Hatch: Back to jail. [Us Magazine]
  • "You know, I just realized there's bigger things in the world than just being a selfish, self-centered, prick." — Scott "American Psycho" Disick. [People]